


Slaves of the Siren Song

by bellmandi86, Harume_HS



Series: Cracks in the Crown [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Aftercare, Alternate Timeline, Angst, Biolum AU, Bioluminescence, Blow Jobs, Body mutilation, Buckle up nerds, Bulges & nooks, Chucklevoodoos, Drama, First Time, Fluff, Gills, Grimdark, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Light BDSM, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Oral Sex, Original Character - Freeform, Other, Plot With Porn, Rough Sex, Seadweller Culture, Slow Burn, Slow To Update, Smut, Tentabulges, Violence, White Magic, Wiggly fins, Worldbuilding, Xeno, sexual consent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-23 08:43:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 29,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13783857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellmandi86/pseuds/bellmandi86, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harume_HS/pseuds/Harume_HS
Summary: [This story is part of the Cracks in the Crown series] [This is part 2]♋ You thought the quadrants were complicated before? Seadwellers are all the more difficult to get your think pan around.♒ You've spent a long time in solitude... it's about time you start to open up about yourself.





	1. ♋ Prologue ♋

**Author's Note:**

> In an Alternate Timeline where everyone survives the game, two neighboring planets for Humans and Trolls: Earth C and Abridgtous. All Alternian Trolls portrayed in this work are 10 Sweeps; All Beforan Trolls portrayed are 11 Sweeps; All Kids portrayed in this work are 21 Years. 
> 
> https://bit.ly/2GxHlc5 (tunes to follow along chapter by chapter, highly recommended)  
> **Based on an MxRP/MSPARP Roleplay Session: Work in Progress.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♋ Everyone is acting weird lately. Why does this have to be YOUR problem?

    It's been a few sweeps since you've beaten the game. Where your human friends have found their home on "Earth C", you and your friends are on your new planet, Abridgtous. Today is the 8th Dim Solstice and you have this terribly frigid day all to yourself. No lusus to bother you, no other trolls bugging you, not a single task to complete. Today is just you and a collection of rom-coms to marathon. You recline back on your loungeplank and pick up the remote. Just as you are about to press play... the door to your rumpusblock is thrown open.

    And just like that, so, too, are your plans thrown to the fucking wind.

“Fucking shit! Is it too much to ask for you fuckcrumpets to fucking knock before just barging in like you own the damn place? I would think that you fucks would've known better by now... whatever. This better be good.”

    Once you turn around to see your intruder, you instantly regret your word choices: Kankri’s here and he is _livid_ that you have spoken to him in such a way. You can already feel the lecture coming on, but you can never be mentally prepared for how long this troll prattles on for.

“I was only making sure you were okay after I’ve been gone for so long! How dare you use such vulgar language in my presence! You know better, you’re 10 sweeps old now and…”

    As he talks, you notice how different he sounds. He just disappears for... what, almost a sweep? And he just shows up unannounced? Someone who was once very considerate and caring of others is standing here and berating you in a harsh tone of voice. You’re not sure where he’s been, but he is definitely not the same Kankri you used to know. Shit, he noticed you’re not paying attention.

“Fine. If you aren’t going to listen to me, I will take you to someone who can.”

    He grabs you by the wrist and he… transports you to another block? Since the fuck when has he ever been able to do that? When he lets go, you find yourself in a run-down block of sorts. The air is stale and the floorboards ache every time you shift your wake or take a step. The faint, consistent dripping of water is the only other thing cutting into the silence and that somehow makes this situation all the more unsettling. The only light coming into the block is from the doorway Kankri is standing in.

“Now you are going to stay here and learn some respect from the master.”

    With that, he turns on his heel and walks to the doorway. What the actual fuck is happening right now? Where are you? What’s going on?

“What ' _master_ '?! Kankri, are you going to give me context before just leaving me here?!”

    The door slams shut.

    Aaaand... great. Fucking great. He’s gone and you have no answers to any of your questions. You need to get out of here. You steadily make your way to the door before the floor shakes slightly. _Fuck._ There is a faint thudding shaking the floor that grows stronger as it approaches you. You do your best to stay on your feet and quickly lean against the wall. Shit. Shit. _Shit_ . This is it, right? Kankri brought you here to be culled for mouthing off one too many times... he wouldn't _really_ do that to you... right? _Right?_ A soft honk and a low, gravelly chuckle tells you that this so-called "master" is here for you. You turn to the noise only to feel yourself shrink in the presence of the leader of the Subjugglators himself: The Grand Highblood. You want to scream and run away, but you're paralyzed. You pale as you feel your voice die in your throat. _Why you? Why you??_

 

    Your name is Karkat Vantas and your life is about to become a living hell.

 

“ **YOUNG BLOOD,** ” he bellows. “ **YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN YOUR PLACE.** ”

“N-no!” you stammer as you back into a wall. “Of course I haven’t!”

“ **LYING TO A HIGHBLOOD? I SEE RIGHT THROUGH YOUR BULLSHIT!** ” He grabs you by the collar and pulls you face-to-face with him.

“I’m sorry!” You’re in a panic, but you don’t know what else to do other than cower and apologize profusely. “Maybe being a leader for that fucking game made me forget or something? I won’t forget again! I swear!”

“ **I NEED TO MOTHERFUCKING MAKE** **SURE** **YOU DON’T.** ”

    You’re forcefully turned around and pressed against the wall with enough force to leave you winded. With one swipe of his claw, your shirt is torn open and falls to the floor in tatters. As much as you want to yell out and push away, you fear this will only reward you with more punishment. You don’t know what to expect, but whatever is going to happen is happening whether you want it to or not. That is, until you feel your pants get pulled down and something slick press against your ass. You decide now is the time to squirm and struggle. However, your attempts aren’t successful. All you can do is yell out in pain as something gets inserted deep into your asshole.

“ **MY PRESENT TO YOU,** ” he sneers, letting you fall back onto the floor. “ **THIS IS MY FAVORITE DEVICE. IF YOU USE ANY VULGAR LANGUAGE, IT WILL VIBRATE INTENSELY.** ”

    Just your luck, something that won’t let you swear. How can it get worse than this?

“ **YOU WILL HAVE TO FIND CRONUS AND ADMIT TO HIM THAT YOU HAVE BEEN NAUGHTY AND THAT HE NEEDS TO STOP YOUR ASS FROM VIBRATING. ONLY THEN WILL HE USE THE REMOTE TO TURN IT OFF.** ”

    Oh, and you also have to degrade yourself in front of someone else! Great.

“And… how long does this have to be in me before it’s able to be removed?”

“ **YOU MUST GO ONE SWEEP WITHOUT INCIDENT.** ”

    You blink, dumbfounded. _How long?_

“A whole _sweep_ without incident?!”

“ **WANT TO MAKE IT TWO?** ”

    No, no you don’t. You shut your mouth, pull up your pants, and hope this is all he has for you.

“ **NOW YOU’RE STARTING TO BEHAVE LIKE A GOOD LITTLE LOWBLOOD. YOU’RE FREE TO GO, AND REMEMBER…** ” He gets very close to you.

“ **I WILL BE MOTHERFUCKING WATCHING.** ”

    His palm slams into your chest and you are overwhelmed with a flash of white light.

 

\-     ♋    ♋    ♋     -

 

    When you are able to see again, you fall to the ground. You are welcomed with a mouthful of sand and the hush of the tides. A beach. Why would he send you here and not just take you back to the hive? You sit up and see Kankri sneering down at you expectantly. You’re going to kick his ass.

“Kankri, you fuckingㅡ” You get cut off by the activation of the vibrator, doubling over onto the sand, writhing and groaning. You bite your lip to keep yourself from moaning too loudly. Kankri's smirk only grows broader as he tsks at you.

“Such a pity you couldn’t go even two minutes without swearing. Looks like you’ll need that device turned off now, won’t you?"

    You manage to throw a frustrated glare his way.

“Right then. I’ll be back as soon as I can.” The taunting tone in his voice just makes your blood boil. He yells out for someone to keep an eye on you.

    He gets a response, but your moans are becoming too loud for you to hear who that could’ve been. You try to sit up enough to get a look, dreading who Kankri left you with to see you in this pitiful state.

    ... You see a very familiar pair of blue and violet shoes approach you.


	2. ♒ Keep Your Distance ♒

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♒ Looks like you have company. Lovely.

Look at this vulgar display they just decided to leave at your doorstep. It’s like they’re taunting with you: ‘ _Hey, Eridan! I bet you thought you were out of the hellhole, but guess what? We’re still going to try to get you. So how about we use your closest friend as bait?_ ’ You’re disgusted. You’re pissed. You’re… kinda embarrassed for him. You know how bad this is, but you’re numb to it now. You’re numb to everything. You do take pity on him, though. Not enough to care, of course. Not anymore. You’re not letting anyone close to you, you swore off of that. But you have to get rid of him somehow…

    You call to your lusus as you pick up the squirming moaning troll, throwing him over your shoulder. He immediately sinks his nails into your shirt, gripping tightly as he moans and writhes, on the verge of tears. This is all just a trap and you’re not falling for it. No matter how close you used to be, you won’t get wrapped up in letting another Vantas into your pump biscuit only to have them torn away. _Eugh… is his bulge unsheathed?_ You cannot believe youve been put in this predicament with himㅡ _AUGH he’s DROOLING on you now!_ That’s it, you need to get rid of him. You straddle onto Skyhorsedad, preparing to head out to sea to drop this horny bastard in the waters. Can he swim? You neither know nor care. If he drowns, you’ll take the blame and happily embrace a just death. You’re so fucking tired of all of these coddamn theatrics you just want to be done.

“Eridan, wvhere do you think you’re going with Vwantas?”

 _NO. Not him. You thought you were done with this._ Your fins dip back as you scowl at him.

“The fuck do you care, this ain’t your business.”  
“Except it _is_ my business.”  
“Right. You need to get laid. Got it. You wwant him so fuckin’ badly? Take him. Otherwwise, he’s goin’ in the sea.”

You feel Karkat start to fuss and struggle in your hold.

“ _Cronus!_ Iㅡ I  was naughty!” He manages to choke out between moans. “I need you toㅡ to stop my ass from vibrating!”

    What the fuck.

Cronus sneers as he withdraws a remote from his pocket, pressing a button.

“You kinky boy~.”

    _What the actual fuck._

“Thank you…” Finally, he’s fallen limp in your hold. But his bulge is still…

No. No. Nope. Not dealing with this. You just drop him back onto the shore. His only response is a grunt on impact.

“So, howv about it, Danny? Do you miss me yet?” His finger daintily strokes your cheek. “You knowv _wve_ could be havwin’ fun like this, too…”  
“You got wwhat you wwanted,” you respond curtly. “Noww piss off, I’m busy.”

He only smirks back at you as he disappears. You look down at Karkat to see him struggling to get up. He falls back onto the ground.

“You’ve got to be kidding me… I can’t move.”

    And you can’t find a reason to stay. You snap your reigns and take off to the skies. Alone.

 

\-     ♒     ♒     ♒     -

 

    Several hours pass before you return to your hive. You decide to stay up in the crow's nest for now. You think you’re alone again. Good. Karkat must’ve gotten someone to take him back to his hive or, better yet, back to Earth C. You still need to unwind from earlier. You decide to withdraw your violin and draw out a few tunes. It helped you during your FLARP sessions, it should still help you now, right? You close your eyes and bow away…

“HEY! Eridan! What are you doing up there?!”

    … You should’ve checked inside. You’re not entertaining this. You whip your bow down at him like an arrow. It barely misses, sticking firmly in the sand. He clearly wasn’t expecting that. He looks back up at you with a shocked expression.

“Hey! What was that for?”

    You shake your head and withdraw another bow and continue to play. You hope he just takes the hint and leaves already.

“How are you still able to play?!”

    Okay, so you’re doing this. You grab a nearby rope and begin your descent. Once you’re on the actual roof of your hive, you jump to shore.

“Wwhat.”

“I asked what you were doing up there.”

“Wwhat does it look like?” You gesture to the bow stuck in the sand.

“But how can you keep playing with the bow down here?” He’s speaking slower than normal.

“I have a feww extra,”  you withdraw a few spares from your sylladex. “They can break pretty easily.”

“And yet you were able to hurl one down at me like a fㅡ” he takes a breath. “Like it’s a weapon?” Is he trying not to swear or something?

“I meant the hairs break.”

“Oh. I... guess that makes sense?”

“Of course it does.” You walk passed him to retrieve your projectile from the ground.

“So why are you in such a biㅡ … in such a bad mood?”

"Wwhy aren't you wwearin' a shirt, Kar?"

" _I_ don't see why that's any of _your_ business."

You give him no response, heading back to your hive… But alas, he persists. “I thought you’d be glad your dancestor isn’t here anymore. Or is it because I didn’t leave?”

    It takes this long for things to click for you: he’s not one of them. Oh, fuck, _now_ you just feel like an asshole.

“Ah, fuck. Okay, no. Let’s just…” You groan to yourself.

You can’t believe you’re this fucking gullible, but…

“Just get inside.” _Idiot._

    You’ll kick yourself in the ass later, but Karkat doesn’t deserve the cold shoulder like this. Not with the past you two have together.

“What’s gotten into you?” he mumbles under his breath. “ _Man, this is much harder than I thought it’d be…_ ”

“Sorry, Kar, I’vve just…”

Wait. You disappear for a sweep and you’re just going to lay this heavy news on him now? No. Make something up. Or… at least dodge the question like you always do. Gotta be vague about it.

“... Just been dealin’ wwith a lot a shit lately.” _Nailed it_ .

“Do I _want_ to know?”

“Like you care.”

“I don’t,” he shrugs, sitting down on the couch. “But that doesn’t stop me from being curious.”

    That makes no sense.

“Wwell, it still ain’t your business, so take it or leavve it.”

    The room falls to silence. You don’t want to sit down, but you can’t just loom over him like this. Now is as good a time as ever to grab something to drink. Tea works, you guess. Just something else to focus on so you don’t have to look at him directly. You return to the livingblock, offering him a cup. You decide to lean against the door for now.

“So, do you wwanna explain to me wwhat the fuck that shameless display in front a my hivve wwas?”

    Karkat gets flustered as he starts to look away, resorting to focusing on his cup. It’s almost like you’re trying to hold a conversation through your drinks.

“Look, that wasn’t something you were supposed to see.”

“Oh, yeah?” You swirl your glass and take a sip. “Then wwhy did you come here?”

“I didn’t _choose_ to come here!” You look up for a moment to see a blush dusting his face.

Fuck this, you’re done nook-footing the situation. You just come right out and ask.

“Cro is controllin’ a plug in your ass that forbids you from swwearin’, ain’t he?”


	3. ♋ Tension ♋

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♋ Eridan is being a cagey douchebag and you are so. Fucking. Bored.

    You sit up, taken aback. How does he know? _How does he know?_ That guess was _way_ too precise for him to _not_ know what’s going on. You set your tea down, watching Eridan intently as you speak.

“Yes. But the only one that can remove it isㅡ”

“The Grand Highblood, I knoww.”

    You eye him suspiciously, furrowing your brows. Is he a part of this? This is some kind of fucked up joke they’re making of you, it has to be. You get up and step closer to him.

“How do _you_ know?”

“None a _your_ business.”

“Actually, this is _all_ of my business. Eridan, I honestly don’t know why this is happening to me, but I’d like to understand what this bullㅡ” Can’t swear. “I’d like to understand why I’ve become a victim in… whatever is going on.”

    He gives you no answer. Did he even hear you? You come face to face with the seadweller. His gaze is vacant and unfocused, as if you’re not in the block at all, let alone right in front of him. You try to get his attention.  

“Hello? Abridgtous to Eridan?” You snap your fingers by his ear. His fin twitches slightly before his focus readjusts onto you. He seems very agitated that you pulled him out of whatever trace he was lost in.

“Wwhy did they bring you here?”

“I didn’t _choose_ to come here, are you ffff…” Keep it together. “Are you even listening to me?”

“Mm…” His nose wrinkles as he takes another sip of his tea. Doesn’t look like that was good enough of an answer, but you have nothing else to offer. What does he want from you?

“Believe me, I’d rather be at my own hive so I didn’t have to talk to anyone and risk this thing activating again.”

“Yeah? Wwell, I wwasn’t exactly happy to havve _you_ here, but I still let you in and gavve you tea that you refuse to fuckin’ touch…”

    Unbelievable. It’s starting to feel like you’re having two different conversations. Really? He’s focused on the goddamn tea? You don’t even _want_ it, why did he give this to you? Why did you take it, you idiot?

“That’s because I know your taste is too _refined_ for my mutant tongue” This is so infuriating, you had to spit the words at him.

“You knoww wwhat I think?” Eridan leans down so he is nose to nose with you, glaring at you. “I think you’re just bein’ a bitter nub because you can’t swwear.”

“...I hate you.” Him and that smug grin of his.

“Because you knoww I’m right.”

    He heads passed you and to his researchblock. Where does he think he’s going? You decide to follow and stand in the doorway, watching him type away at his husktop.

“Well, if you don’t want me here so bad, why don’t you just, oh, I don’t know, take me back to my hive?”

“You knoww, I’d lovve to, but I can’t.”

“And why the heeeㅡ” God, this is hard. “Why not?”

“I had plans before you showwed up, and I plan on carryin’ on wwith the rest a my day as normal.”

“Is it really that much of an inconvenience for you toㅡ”

“Yes, it is.”

    You’re gonna punch this fucker into the next bilunar perigee.

“So, what am _I_ supposed to do, then?”

“I don’t knoww, fuckin’ find somethin’ to do.”

    This douchebag is grinding so hard on your nerves, you’re pretty sure you could start a fire with this friction. Why is he being so cold to you? It’s not like you asked to have this burden thrust onto you (no pun intended). But, he doesn’t seem to be in the mood for you right now. You head back to the livingblock. You hope he stops being a complete asshole at some point, you _do_ want to go back to your hive. Who knows, maybe he’ll open up to you… better yet, maybe he’ll help you.

    Yeah, right. That’ll be some dumb fucking luck.

    But something to do… He has a plethora of books and other reading material. Maybe he’ll have something interesting enough for you to read? Most of these are historical texts, combat guides, and some very old looking scrolls. In other words, boring as shit. If you get back to your hive, you have to give him something more worthwhile to read.

    You decide to settle on a small, black, leatherbound book. _Seadwellers: The Inner Workings and Processes of the Nautical Aristocracy_. The title just leave a poor taste in your thinkpan. This book is going to be a pain in the ass, you can already tell, but there doesn’t appear to be anything better around. You sit down and crack it open.

 

\-      ♋    ♋    ♋     -

 

    Not even a half hour goes by and you’re still on the first chapter. Not that it’s a long chapter, but holy _shit_ was the author panrusted when he wrote this. No part of his writing is coherent and it feels like the sentences rephrase and repeat themselves for paragraphs at a time. Who writes like this? Who decided to let this troll be a literary sadist and make something so fucking painful to read? Or is he just that much of a stardust-snorting fucktard that this only made sense when he was on some kind of high? You need to take a break before you destroy this book (no matter how much you would view that to be a favor to the universe).

    You head back to the researchblock; Eridan's still typing away. He now has a few books out on the desk. He occasionally breaks away from the keyboard to scrawl away in a book sitting in his lap. Is this what he does in his spare time? And for what? The game is over and your planet is under new rule. But, if he’s been working for as long as you’ve been bitching about that “book”, he probably needs a break, too.

“Hey, Eridan. What are you even doing?” He doesn’t answer. What is it with this guy and his inattentiveness? You try again, shoving him on the shoulder this time. He hums to you in a vague form of acknowledging your presence, but that’s about it. “It’s been what? A few hours? You need a break.” You decide to take away his book; this should make him give you the time of day. You hope.

“It hasn’t been _that_ long, you’re just exaggeratin’ because you’re bored.” He doesn’t even give you the common decency of eye contact when he responds?

“No, it feels that way because I was reading a book that actively kills my daㅡ” This sweep cannot end soon enough. “Reading a book that actively kills my thinkpan cells.”

“Wwhy didn’t you just read a different book?”

“Because all your books look like they’re boring as shhhhhhㅡ” You groan loudly. “Boring as watching paint dry.”

“Wwas that one a your hobbies growwin’ up?” This motherfucker...

“What? Reading decent books?” He shakes his head. “No. I spent my days traveling the countryside with my lusus.” Even now, you have to be a smartass. “Of course one of my hobbies was reading. And it still is.”

“No, I mean wwatchin’ paintㅡ” He pushes his glasses up as he rubs his face and groans. “Fuck it. Wwhat do you wwanna do? Wwhat can I do to appease your _evver-demandin’_ attention span? Do you wwanna go outside or somethin’?”

“I don’t know. What else is there to do in your hive? You need a break, too. Whether you want one or not. So, if I’m going to hang out outside, so are you.” He finally looks at you, as if taking a break is some huge burden. He rolls his eyes, but he eventually gets up.

“Fine. Let’s go.” He heads out of the researchblock and to the front door.

“Good.”

You follow him out, the brisk ocean air rushing to meet you. How can he walk outside like this without a coat or something?  

“Hey, you wwanted to be outside. Wwhat’s takin’ you?”

“You act like this break is only going to last two minutes.” You can’t help but shiver slightly as a cold wind cuts through you. How the hell is Eridan not affected by this shit? “Seriously, enjoy a long break. It won’t kill you.” He turns to look at you, crossing his arms.

“You cold?” His tone makes it sound like he doesn’t believe this cold is affecting you.

“As a matter of fact, yes. Yes I am.” When did you start holding yourself? It doesn’t matter, it’s not helping you at all. “How the heㅡ” _Just kill me now._ “How are you not?”

"Wwell, _I'm_ wwearin' a shirt, for one thing." You glare at him, but he just rolls his eyes and heads back inside.

“Hey! You don’t get to t-talk shㅡ to act smart and then w-walk away! G-get your aㅡ your butt b-back out here! You’re t-taking a break, Ampora!”

    By the time you finish yelling at him, he’s back outside. Oh, good for _him_ , _he_ has his cape on.

“Seriously?! You just went inside to g-get yourself a cape?!”

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” He withdraws what you can only assume to be a large pelt or snuggleplane from his captcha. “I didn’t forget about your wwhiny ass.”

    Once he drapes the cape over your shoulders, it doesn’t seem like there’s much of a breeze anymore. It’s very thick and very soft… goddamnit, not only can you not swear, but now you have to resist the urge to fucking purr. No way do you plan on doing that around _anyone_. Especially when they’re being a cold and distant bitch. As nice as this cape is, it doesn’t seem to want to stay on your shoulders. That is, until he withdraws a golden symbol-absent clasp and fastens the two sides.

“There. Noww you can be a capedouche wwith me.”

“The only reason I’m keeping this thing on is because it’s warm. Not so I can be a capeguy with you.” Can’t be too safe. Can’t risk those Faygo-chugging assholes considering _douche_ to be a fucking swear.

“Wwell, you don’t havve to wworry about bein’ a capedouche either wway.”

“Is that so?” It’s starting to get harder and harder to keep yourself from purring. It doesn’t help that you’re holding the cape so it’s wrapped completely around your torso.

“Yeah.” He starts to walk down to the shore. “Because they’re fuckin’ _cloaks_.”

“Perfect.” You roll your eyes. “Dodged _that_ bullet.”

    Capes, cloaks, they’re both something that hangs on your damn shoulders and drapes over your back. Makes no real difference to you. You’re just glad he’s actually talking to you again. Kind of. You start walking quickly to catch up with Eridan; you still have questions and he’s not going to ignore them.


	4. ♒ The Pact ♒

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♒ Karkat is being especially invasive for someone who claims to not give a shit.

You know, for someone who claims to be indifferent to what’s going on in your life, he sure as hell wants to have his hands in your schedule. You don’t need a break, you need to get this work done. But no, instead he decides now is as great a time as ever to take a leisurely stroll along the shoreline of your hive. You don’t even know why he agreed to this, it’s far too cold out here for someone with blood as warm as his. Even with him wearing one of your warmer cloaks. It isn’t even a nice shoreline, either. The sand is dark and littered with jagged rocks you occasionally have to step over, so it’s less of a leisurely stroll and more of an attentive navigation.

“I have some questionsㅡ” Oh _fuck no_.

“ I only came out here so you’d quit buggin’ me. No questions.”

“Well, that’s too daㅡ too bad, because that’s what’s happening.”

“Kar, the game is fuckin’ ovver. Has been for _at least_ a swweep noww. You wweren’t evven on my teamㅡ Wwhat is any a my life your fuckin’ business?”

“If you didn’t want me here in the first place, why didn’t you just drag me back to my hive? You could’ve very easily avoided all of this, but now, I’m stuck here with you. Having to be overly careful with my words instead of being a fuㅡ being a mute for a sweep.”

    Fucking _groan_. Classic Karkat stubbornness; you expect nothing less. Your fins wiggle for a moment as you consider taking him back to his hive… Nah, you can’t be bothered right now. He wouldn’t last that whole sweep in silence, anyway.

“Fine. Seein’ that it’s the only wway I’ll be able to get any kind a peace, please, arm yourself wwith a glass and proceed to quench your thirst for knowwledge from my graciously ovverflowwin’ thinkpan. I’ll fuckin’ keel ovver if it doesn’t get relievved.” You’re sure to lay the sarcasm on as thick as Karkat usually does. Maybe he’ll appreciate the gesture?

“Are you sure your thinkpan isn’t already rusted?” He scoffs. Of course that was a wasted attempt on your part. _God_ , you’re such a fucking jackass.

He looks down to his feet and you continue on for a few minutes in silence. You catch him occasionally sneaking glances at you. A strong gust of wind brushes passed you. Karkat let’s out an audible shiver. You can tell he wants to swear _so badly_ just to reaffirm how cold it is. You hope to the Outer Gods he doesn’t. You really don’t want to deal with his moaning, scrambling ass again.

    He finally holds eye contact with you.

“So, what exactly _are_ you working on?”

“I thought you didn’t givve a shit.”

“I’m pretty sure I already told you I’m just curious.”

“Is this entire convversation goin’ to be indulgin’ your fuckin’ curiosities?” You really don’t feel like playing Twenty Inquiries with him, but he doesn’t seem to be leaving you any room to dodge his meddling advances otherwise. You sigh… “It’s a spell book.” You mumble reluctantly.

“A spell book? Really? Didn’t you always call that shㅡ call that stuff _SCIENCE_ , Mr. Prince of Science-y bullshㅡ” You’re starting to think he’s going to have an aneurysm. “ _things_.”

    Your fins dip back and you stop, crossing your arms.

“You knoww, for someone that wwants me to talk, you’re gonna start fuckin’ mockin’ me wwhen I finally open up? If that’s howw you’re goin’ to be, you can go fuck yourself.”

“Why the heㅡ Why are you being such an aㅡ such a baㅡ such a diㅡ such a priㅡ” Oh. My. God. Can he _really_ not think of another word for asshole that isn’t a swear? “Why are you being like this?” Guess not.

“Oh, like you givve a shit. Or is this still a selfish indulgence on your part?”

“What’s _really_ going on? You’ve never been like this with me before. Didn’t we used to be closer than this?”

    The fucking _nerve_. You’re half tempted to go back to your original plan and catapult his ass into the sea.

“Yeah? I thought so, too. Wwe had a pact and evverythin’. Exceptㅡ OH RIGHT: You broke off that fuckin’ pact in evvery aspect a the wword. Did you forget that you just threww me awway like that or are you just that cold?”

“And did _you_ forget what you did that even prompted me to do that in the first place? Because _I_ didn’t! You decided to go on a little culling spree right in front of me! Did you forget _that_ little detail?”

“Yeah, and howw fuckin’ heartless a me to spare you.” You roll your eyes. “Clearly, that’s my fault for not cullin’ you on the spot wwith evveryone else. My fuckin’ mistake!”

    He opens his mouth to retort, but that statement clicked with something. He closes his mouth, his original comment obviously died in his throat; so what the hell could he be planning on saying now? After what seems like sweeps, he finally speaks again. It’s not at his usual volume, maybe three notches quieter.

“Why _didn’t_ you cull me on the spot?” He’s not even looking at you directly anymore. Well, he’s trying to keep eye contact, but he quickly breaks it shortly after it gets established and reestablished. You’re quick to respond, though.

“None a your business. I had my reasons.” Your fins twitch as you look away. “Take it or leavve it.” You look away before he’s able to try engaging eye contact again.

“How about no? Considering ' _your business_ ' had to do with whether I lived or died in that moment. I think I have the right to know _why_ you didn’t just fuㅡ didn’t just cull me when it wouldn’t have even taken you a second toㅡ”

“I nevver wwanted to!” Perhaps that was louder than you wanted. “You knoww, as much as I may be gripin’ about our little pact, that nevver fuckin’ mattered to me. I _nevver_ had issues wwith you. Evven if you wweren’t exactly kissin’ my ass to appease my opinions, at least you didn’t take me for a fuckin’ joke like evveryone else did.” You sigh and continue walking. “At least that’s howw I saww things.”

   It takes him a moment to start walking with you again.

“If that’s the case, why have you been pushing me away since I’ve been dumped here?”

    You give no answer. He picks up the pace to walk in front of you and stops square in your path.

“Well? Are you really not going to give me a daㅡ an answer? Can’t think of some vague answer for me to call bullㅡ for me to call you out on? Why the heㅡ” Oh, his eye is twitching... “Why are you pushing me away, Eridan?”

   You stare at him, watching his face. Ten sweeps old and he still acts like a fucking wriggler. Does he care or not? You just don't know anymore. You just shake your head.

“Doesn’t matter.” You walk around him, hands in your pockets. “Can wwe talk about somethin’ else?”

    It takes him a moment, but he sighs and walks next to you once more.

“Fine. What’s going on with you? You never did answer that.”

“Nothin’ anymore.”

“Anymore? What do you mean?”

“Wwell, you knoww I wwas an Orphaner back on Alternia, right?”

“Of course I do. Pretty sure we had several conversations about it at one time or another.”

“That wwas all I did. Hunt, cull, and havve the occasional blackrom exchange wwith Vvris. That wwas my life. But, noww that Gl’bgolyb is the size of a fuckin’ cuttlefish, her glubs aren’t so lethal anymore. So, I don’t havve to do any of that taxin’ wwork.”

“So, you not having to do any of that shㅡ any of that anymore is causing you to be such an aㅡ” He groans. “You know what I’m trying to say there.”

“No.”

“Then  what is? That's what I was asking. I wasn’t asking ' _what’ve you been doing to keep yourself busy?_ ' or whatever.”

“Oh, that’s right. My mistake.” You roll your eyes. “And I still ain’t tellin’ you.” If his inability to swear doesn’t make him pop a blood vessel, your vague responses sure will.

“Of fffffffㅡ course you’re not.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Good to know your stubbornness hasn’t changed at all.” Was he being genuine or if that was a sarcastic remark?

“Likewwise.”

    You continue your walk on the beach in silence.

 

\-     ♒     ♒     ♒     -

 

If you two keep up with this walk, you’re going to start forming a moat on the island. How long has it been, like an hour? Surely, it’s been long enough that you can head back inside. Or at least long enough that Karkat is getting fed up with the cold. But no, he doesn’t seem to be done with you yet. _Just let this fucking end._

 

And, of course, he comes at you with more. Fucking. Questions.

 

“Hey, if it didn’t matter to you in the first place, like you so adamantly claim, why did you even bring it up?”

“Wwhat do you mean?” You thought you were done with that discussion. You thought wrong.

“What I mean is, if the pact didn’t matter to you at all, why bother bringing it up earlier?”

    God, you’re done walking. You decide to just sit on a nearby rock and look out to the horizon.

“I guess… It wwas the sentiment of it.”

“Sentiment? In what way was our pact, by any means of the word, something of sentimental value to you?”

“Wwell, I had an image to uphold in front a evverybody. Howw could I say I wwanted all the landdwwellers exterminated and yet be closest to you? You didn’t havve to entertain it… Then again, maybe you thought I _wwas_ serious about it all this time? About you bein’ the exception just because a your blood color.”

    Saying that out loud, the pact now comes off like it was a hostage situation: ' _I won’t cull you because you’re a mutant_ '. That can be twisted so hard out of context, that sentence is forming friction burns on the surface the longer you think about it. You look over to Karkat. He looks pretty crestfallen, betrayed by this reveal.

“What the fuㅡ what the hㅡ what is _that_ supposed to mean? Was I just some _toy_ or whatever to youㅡ”

“No, Karㅡ”

“What were you even planning to do with me if that was the case? Were you planning onㅡ”

“I wwasn’t planning anyㅡ”

“Were you planning on turning me into your slave, servant thiㅡ?

“Of course not, Iㅡ”

“Or were you going to cull me last and do it slowly in some sort of sick and twisted wㅡ”

 _For fuck’s sake, quit talking over me!_ You stand up, your fins fanning out.

“Because you wwere the only real friend I had!” Well, that made Karkat’s words immediately die in his throat. Your fins droop down as you look away. “Outta evveryone wwe spent the session wwith, you wwere the only one that I thought wwas wworth keepin’ around. But I didn’t wwant to say that, so I made the _genius idea_ to make it about your blood instead.”

“That’s got to be bullㅡ You’ve got to be kidding me. There is _no way_ you thought I was the only one worth keeping around.”

“No? Try me.” You cross your arms.

“Let’s see, how about the person you kept asking me red advice for: Feferi?”

“Fuckin’ bitch that wwas a mistake to fawwn ovver. Next.” No hesitation on that one, huh?

“When exactly did you come to that realization?” He shakes his head. “Alright, what about your old kismesis: Vriska?”

“As much as I still hate her…” You sigh. “Apparently, I ain’t wworth her time anymore. She’s movved on. Anyone else?”

“Alright, what about Sollux. He seemed like a potential kismesis for you.”

    You can’t help but scoff at this.

“You saww that fight yourself: he ain’t strong enough. And if anythin’, he’s just a disgrace to the flushed quadrant. No respect for prevvious relationships.”

“You think I didn’t notice him putting shame to the flush quadrant’s name? I thought it was appalling having to watch him fuㅡ having to watch him switch between matesprits more frequently than he switched between socks. It just made me want to rant to him about what it means to be in the daㅡ in a matespritship with someone.”

“Lucky you didn’t havve to givve _me_ a lecture like that, right?” He rolls his eyes at you.

“Yeah, but I was giving you a different lecture. Just one. Multiple times. Because you could never get it to stay in your thinkpan for longer than a day or two.”

“Oh, no, I understood you.” You start heading back to your hive. “Just nevver did anythin’ wwith it.” It doesn’t take long for him to follow after you.

“Then why the heㅡ why did I have to continuously tell you that lecture?”

“I don’t knoww.” You open the door. “Wwhy are still _not_ wearin' a shirt?” Karkat closes the door behind you. 

“I refuse to acknowledge that." He grumbles. "As I was saying, I thought you either ignored my lecture or you just forgot about it. I was giving you redrom _gold_ . Yet, you always told me that you decided to _not_ listen to my advice after asking for it, I figured you needed that lecture again.”

“Constant lecturing: Sounds like you.”

“You would fuㅡ you _would_ say that daㅡ that bullshㅡ” This is painful for you now. “That. Just _that_.”

    You sit down on the couch. Nice to finally be back inside.

“Still, I can't help but feel a bit guilty about that wwhole pact thing. Howw about I make it up to you?”

    Is this the first time Karkat is seeing you expressing _remorse?_ Because it sure as hell looks like it. He raises an eyebrow at you, studying you for a few moments before speaking.

“Oh yeah?” He crosses his arms, skeptical. “How exactly do you plan on doing that?”

“Let’s make a neww pact, but this time, let’s make one that actually fuckin’ matters. To both of us.”

“Alright. I’ll try not to be so... invasive and stubborn.” Ha. That’s a laugh. _That nubby-horned troll won't last five fucking minutes._

“And in exchange, I’ll try to be more honest wwith you. Deal?”

“Starting now?” Oh fuck, he has more lined up already?

“... Yeah. Do wwe havve a deal?” You offer your hand so you can shake on it, which he quickly takes you up on before accompanying you on the couch.

“Good.”

“So, wwhat did you want to ask me about, then?”

“Your fins.”

    Your fins perk reflectively when he mentions them. Did you hear that correctly?

“My… my fins?”

“Yes. In the book I was reading earlier, that was written by a panrusted wriggler that never learned how to write and should've never learned to scrawl with a pen, it started talking about 'fin codes'? He kept jumping around to the point where it was so unintelligible that I wanted to throw the daㅡ the book as far as I could into the ocean.”

“I mean… yeah, there’s a code wwe use, but I don’t see wwhatㅡ”

“Teach it to me.”


	5. ♋ Codes ♋

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♋ Karkat's first lesson on seadweller culture. Shouldn't be too hard, right?

    Eridan just looks at you, a shocked expression gracing his face for a moment before it turns into a skeptical one. “You wwant to learn fin code? . . . _wwhy_ ?”

“Maybe because I think it will be fu ㅡ” _Not fun, think of something else._ “It will be handy in the long run.” He just raises a brow at you.

“...'Handy'?”

    You didn’t want to say _because you’re curious_ again; you know that answer will only get you so far.

“That and I never noticed your fins moving before. I always saw Feferi’s, but never yours. I thought it was just a Fuschia-exclusive thing. I would’ve asked her ages ago, but she’s too daㅡ” _God damn this fucking assplug from hell._ “Just too cheerful for me to talk to. But now that I know that it's a _Seadweller_ exclusive and not a _Fuschia_ exclusive, I want to learn. And _not_ from that collective of unintelligible scribbles you call a book that should’ve never been published.”

“And wwhat wwould you evven _do_ wwith that knowwledge? Evven if I _did_ teach you, it’s not like you can replicate it or say anythin’ back to me.”

“Well, I would finally be able to know what you’re saying whenever your fins move. They sure as heㅡ” You swear, this is going to end up killing you one way or another. “They moved quite a bit when we were talking outside. For all I know, you could’ve been teasing me about my inability to swear with me being none the wiser.”

    There it is. That goddamn smug smirk of his. And it’s accompanied by his fucking fins flickering and twitching away! However, you do notice that these movements seem to be in a different pattern than what you’ve observed already… What the hell could they mean?!

“I wwouldn’t say ‘ _teasin_ ’ ’.”

“Then what _would_ you say?”

    With that, he only grins more. All you can do now is glare at him as he continues to avoid answering your question. He turns his head and you notice Eridan is sticking his tongue out. This bastard is moving to a whole new level of cocky right now, and you’re about five seconds from losing it.

    You grit your teeth through your words in some sort of attempt to keep composure. “If it’s not teasing, then what are you saying, Ampora?”

“Alright,” Eridan straightens his posture once more, “Let me teach you the basics.” You slowly start to calm down; at least he’s finally answering you. “To understand the code, you gotta know its primal purpose: mood indication.”

“Mood indication?”

“Yeah, likeㅡ”

“So, you were essentially laughing at my fuㅡ at my misery?”

    Eridan is silent for a moment, contemplating his word choice before he continues. “Alright, so… So, sometimes I do it on purpose, but it’s mostly reflex. For example, wwhen I get sad…” And just like showing an example, the seadweller’s fins dip down. You nod as you make a mental note of this; so far, it doesn’t seem too complicated to comprehend. “They also do that wwhen I’m sick. Dead givveawway. Or, wwhen I get agitated or defensivve…” His fins stay down, but dip back.

    You aren’t entirely sure if there was a difference, so you lean in closer to confirm that they did indeed move, even if only a bit.

“You’vve seen this before, I’m sure.” He accompanies the new postion with a warning scowl.

“Yes. _That_ brings back memories…”

“Thought so. Or…” His fins come back forward and fan open fully, eyebrows raised. “How about this one?”

    _This one seems easy enough._ “Surprised?”

“Right.”

“That wasn’t too hard to figure out.” You smirk ever so slightly, proud of yourself for getting it, even if it was a simple expression to read.

“But it can be hard to see from my standard position.” His fins return to their resting place. _Holy shit, they barely moved._

“Okay, yeah, I can see that.”

“But wwhen you call my attention or I hear a sudden noise…” He grabs a bow and throws it behind him randomly. It ends up hitting a little statue on his shelf, making it fall and hit the floor. His fins flare back forward, but it’s a quick flicker. In turn, your own ear twitches slightly towards the noise as you keep your focus on the Eridan’s fins.

    You mumble to yourself. “Okay, so that’s not much different from what I do when stuff like that happens.”

“So, those are the main points, really. Wwe use the emotions and facial expressions to communicate the code. Certain rhythms and patterns say things, but it’s broken sentences. Kinda.”

“Alright, but that still doesn’t exactly tell me what you were saying on the daㅡ” God fucking damnit, you hate not being able to talk freely. How the hell are you expected to last _an entire fucking sweep_?! “What you were saying on the beach.”

“Let’s start wwith little things.” His fins flicker slightly, almost like perking a tiny bit before going back to normal, with tiny little waves.

“So…” You think for a few moments. “You were trying to get my attention? Or I had your attention?”

“That’s your first wword: Hello.”

“So, while you were talking to me before, you were just saying _hello_?”

“No. That’s the first thing I’m teachin’ you. I’ll get there.”

    You groan. “Fine. Got it. Lesson one: Hello.”

    His fins flicker hello again. “It can also be reflex wwhen being content or bored. Sometimes my fins do that wwithout me knowwin’. Now, this second one you’vve seen before.” His fins quickly dip down about a third of the way and back up a few times. Hey! It’s that pattern you made a note of a few minutes ago!

    You watch this pattern for a bit. You know your answer is going to be wrong, especially since it doesn’t make a lick of sense, but damnit if you’re not going to guess.

“Goodbye?”

“Nope. Here, let’s see if you can guess.” He closes his eyes and you watch closely. He gets a gentle, genuine smile on his face, softly chuckling and his fins repeat the pattern once more.

    Well, you’re not used to seeing him smiling like this. It’s… kind of nice, even if he is faking it. That thought is quickly pushed to the side as you try think of what the fin code could be. “Amusement?”

    At first, it seems like he doesn’t hear you. It takes him a minute or two to snap out of that expression and open his eyes. “Uh, kinda.”

“Kinda?”

“The basic wword is laugh, but it’s pretty flexible in context. It could also mean happy, or smile, or…” He looks directly at you, making eye contact, “cute.” His raises a brow.

“ _Cute?_ Wait, what’s with that look?!” You can feel your face dust with a red blush as you realize _exactly_ what that look was for. “Wait! Were you calling me _cute_?! I am **_not_ ** cute!”

“In the context from before, wwhen you wwanted to knoww somethin’ you didn’t knoww,” he pauses for a moment. “Wwell, I guess _cute_ wwasn’t the right wword. Maybe swweet, or…” he exaggerates by batting his eyes while wiggling his fins in that damn code again, “adorable.”

    Oh, you can just **_feel_ ** your eye starting to twitch again, but your face is getting redder. “I’m not _adorable_ either! Being a leader means you have to learn things you don’t know or you end up failing! I can’t help it that I am still in that mindset!” You mutter to yourself. “Then again, I wasn’t that great of a leader in the end anyway…”

“So let’s get to the point. Wwhat you wwant to knoww? Howw the fins communicate quadrants?”

    And just like that, your blush fades away and your eyes start to light up at the thought of there being codes for the quadrants. “Wait. Your fins can do that? They can _really_ communicate quadrants?” You are definitely sitting up straighter, though, you try to make it as subtle as possible.

“Yeah,” he looks away, “Downside is it makes it hard to hide crushes or secret relationships so if it becomes reflex…” He looks back at you. “And when it _DOES_ , you’re fucked. So, like, if you’re talking with someone and they bring up the same troll you’re secretly pale for…” and his fins start moving. Up, open, down, back, up. Almost like his fins are trying to make the diamond symbol. “Dead giveaway.”

    You try hard not to grin, actually finding this amusing. On top of that, you know that this knowledge is going to come in handy when you reread some of your romance novels when, or if, you get back to your hive. “That’s actually pretty daㅡ pretty interesting.”

“Okay, here’s another one.” His fins start a third of the way down, then go up, down, up, and then a third of the way down again; right where they had started. A heart.

“The flushed quadrant?”

“Right.”

“Odd way of signing it, but I guess it makes sense. What’s next? The black or ashen quadrant?”

“You tell me.” His fins start open, go down halfway, twitch, go down fully, twitch twice, go up halfway, twitch, then open. Clubs?

“Ashen?”

“Yeah. That one is really tough for some people to pick out if they don’t wwatch the entire sequence. So it can lead to a _lot_ a drama and mixed signals if you only catch certain parts.”

“I’m going to assume it’s the last bit that would end in drama if people missed it?”

“Last and middle. Like so:” His fins start up, drop down, twitch twice, and come up. Hey, this was the the first thing he teased you with earlier.

“So that’s the black quadrant, huh?” It clicks. “Wait! That was the first thing you were teasing me with?!”

“Maybe.”

“No! Not ‘maybe’! That was definitely what you were fin signing at me when you were fuuuuuuuuuㅡ” you barely catch yourself in this heated moment, “when you were teasing me earlier!”

“I wwas teasin’ you. And noww that you knoww wwhat I was signin’, I can givve you a minute to… retroactivvely get properly pissed.”

“Except I can’t because I can’t fuㅡ” and you proceed to yell out a groan in frustration at being unable to swear.

“Well, I mean… Close enough. Hey, I’m makin’ an effort here. I’m stayin’ committed to my end a the pact.”

    Eridan definitely said something, but you’re too busy trying to calm down to hear him completely. You’re starting to think that this sweep without swearing is going to end up killing you. Well, you started thinking that a while ago, now you _know_ it’s going to kill you. Either that or you’ll eventually slip up and the sweep will restart and never end, since the damn Grand Highclown said a whole sweep _without incident_. You only somewhat snap out if it when you hear your name being said.

“Kar.”

    This causes you to actually look at the seadweller again to see him smiling a bit and flickering his fins.

> _Hello_ <

“Okay, why are you saying 'hi' to me when we’ve been talking forㅡ” You quickly realize that Eridan is trying to help calm you down. You hit your hand to your forehead as you take a deep breath, calming down just a bit more. “Yes. Hello.”

> _Hello_ <

“Hi.”

> _Happy_ <

“You’re happy I am starting to calm down?”

    Now his fins are fluttering like mad as he starts glubbing.

“Happy? Content? I can’t even tell if you’re fuㅡ if you’re testing me anymore or not.” You watch his fins closely for familiar patterns.

    He laughs a bit, sitting back and smiling contently now.

> _Happy_ <

“Okay, you’re definitely either testing me, and the answer is 'happy' or you’re genuinely happy.”

“Yes.”

“Was…” You just eye Eridan, “was that a yes to you’re testing me? Or a yes to you being genuinely happy?”

    He looks over to you. “Both.”

“Right…” You roll your eyes as you lean back into the loungeplank, trying to completely calm down.

 

\-      ♋    ♋    ♋     -

 

    It took you a while, but you’ve calmed back down. Keeping your attention partially on Eridan, you notice his eyes are closed while he fiddles with the clasp holding his cape in place; or is it a cloak? You can’t tell the difference. But you also notice his fins go down a third of the way. This catches your curiosity and you watch the fins closely.

    The fins twitch slightly, but stay at that level. Something is on Eridan’s mind, he practically looks lost in thought.

“So, I’m going to guess _that_ ,” you point slightly at the fins, “and the fact that your eyes are closed while you look lost in thought means that you’re remembering something?”

    His eyes open slightly. “Hm?” And the fins go back to their normal resting position, “Oh, that must’vve been reflex. But yeah, I wwas thinkin’ about shit.” He pulls his hand away from the clasp.

“I’m going to guess it was about shhhhㅡ” you let out a mix of a sigh of defeat and a groan of annoyance, “ _stuff_ … that happened a while ago?”

“Kinda.”

“So that’s definitely a yes then.”

“Yeah. It is. Damn, this sucks.”

“What, me being stuck here? Me kind of understanding your daㅡ your fin code and interrupting your train of thought?”

“No. Tryin’ to be honest wwith you. Evven if I don’t wwant to be.”

“Why the heㅡ why does it suck that you have to be honest with me? It isn’t that fuㅡ it’s not that daㅡ it should not be that difficult for you to do with me.”

“Really? Havve you _met_ me?”

“Yes. And you don’t seem to have a problem doing what you want. Most of the time, at least. You act like being honest with me is going to end up killing you.”

“It’s habit.”

“Well, you didn’t seem strained when teaching me…” _What the hell do Seadwellers even call ‘Fin Code’?_   “Fin?”

“Wwell, that’s because…” You notice his face tinting in a violet blush.

> _Happy_ <

“I’vve nevver had someone that wwanted to knoww. Most a the time, they just laugh at me; or wworse,” he cups his fins in a protective manner, “they’ll try pullin' on them.”

“God daㅡ,” _Groan_. “Jeez. I can see why you would want to try and keep the whole fin language under control on land.”

“It’s so hard! That’s one a the reasons the collar on my cloak wwas so high. No one could sneak up on me and see it wwithout me knowwin’.”

“Oh, so you don’t wear one to be aㅡ” You stop yourself. You still can't think of a different insult for 'douche'. “You know what: nevermind.”

“I said _one a_ the reasons. It just growws on you after a wwhile. That hands-free wwarmth wwith arm freedom. Kinda hard to let go of once you havve it long enough.”

“Right. Wearing one all the time still seems like it would be a hassle.”

“Wwell, you’re free to think wwhat you wwant, Kar. I wwon’t try to provve you wwrong on it.”

    You shrug. “Do I look like I even care?”

“About this?” he gestures to his cape/cloak thing. “No. About these?” his fins wiggle. “Yes.”

“Your code is weird, but it’s definitely nice to get an idea of what you’re trying to say, on purpose or not. I won’t lie about that.”

“Exactly.”


	6. ♒️ Fuschia Ruler ♒️

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♒ More company?! Can't you just be left alone? And what, now you gotta entertain him?! God, you're so tired.

    You don’t know how long it’s been since you’ve been able to let your guard down and just talk with Karkat like this. Sweeps? Plus the eternity you had being dead before the game ended? You feel so starved of this. It’s… nice. Your fins flicker in contentmentㅡ

 

_KSSSHH_

 

    And just like, the moment _literally_ comes to a crashing halt. The glimmer of fractured glass and polished gold wisp passed your field of vision as a 2x3dent firmly plants into the floor with a prominent _thwack_. The shock of it, surprisingly, gets no reaction from Karkat. Oh wait, it did; he’s just biting into his hand to hold back a torrent of colorful language.

 

God.

Fuckin’.

_SHIT._

 

    Of _course_ she’s here now. You completely forgot she was supposed to come see you today. You pinch the bridge of your nose and groan in annoyance as you get onto your feet to reluctantly greet your… guest. You guess. You open the door and greet her like you’ve done countless times. But she stops you.

“Before you say anyfin, it wasn’t on porpoise this time. I was trying to skewer someone.”

You roll your eyes and go back to your greeting.

“Oh, look, wwhat a pleasant surprise. Kar, look, it’s Meenah.” You step back and hold the door open with an exaggerated bow. “Wwon’t you come inside, your highness.”

“Shell yeah! I gotta get my trident, anyway.”

> _Annoy_ <

    She swaggers inside, brushing the glass aside from her path. You hope she doesn’t stay long.

“So, wwhat brings you here?”

“You’re kidding me, right? We agreed I’m supposed to check on you like once a perigee or waterever.”

“I didn’t ‘agree’ to fuck all, that was somefin’ you and _Vvris_ agreed on because I wwas ‘botherin’ her too much’ or somefin’.”

“Somefin like that, shore.” She looks around. “But I don’t sea why I need to be here, you have Crabby keeping you company.” She nods in acknowledgement to Karkat.

“So,” he starts, taking his hand from his mouth. “Who the heㅡ who was even outside that you were trying to hit?”

“I’m not shore,” She shrugs, pulling her trident out of the floor. “I just saw someone and got the urge. They were piering through your window, too.”

He scoffs. “Right.”

“Speaking of piercing flesh, what’s with the way you’re talking? You’re stuttering like someone sashimi-d your vocal cords or somefin.”

“I’m not allowed to swear,” he mumbles. “Grand Highblood’s orders.”

“Oh reely? Or what?” She crosses her arms, now skeptical to the situation.

“He’s got a plug in his ass and Cro has the remote for it.” She has her attention on you now.

“Why the flying fish does that basshat have the remote?”

“Wwho knowws?” _You do, jackass._

“Alright.” She thinks for a moment. “How much?”

“Howw much wwhat?”

“How much are you willing to pay me to get it from him?”

    Of course that’s what it was going to boil down to.

“‘ _Payment_ ’? Hold on a glubbin’ sec, wwhy don’t wwe discuss payment for my fuckin’ wwindoww?”

“ _I’d_ say that was a coddamn act of bait! Otherwaves, I wouldn’t even be here offering my help.”

    She’s right, but you doubt you have anything she would want.

“Waterever, I think Imma do you a favor since I definistrated your window.”

“Thanks, Meenah.” Karkat sighs.

“Don’t thank me yet, Nubs,” She calls back as she climbs back out the window. “Once I get it back from fishdick, _I’ll_ have the remote. _Then_ we’ll talk business.”

“Keep me posted, got it?” You call back.

“I’ll sea you when I sea you!”

    And with that, she was gone. You walk off to the kitchen to fetch a broom and make some shrapnel-free tea.

 

\-     ♒     ♒     ♒     -

 

“Eridan? ... Hey! ... Eridan?! You still with me?”

    You knit your brows as you blink awake. Your fins wiggle idly as you look to Karkat.

> _Hello_ <

“Huh?”

“I was asking what you do to pass the time. Did you really just fall asleep there?”

“Hmm… I guess.” You sit up and stretch. “Wwhat do _I_ do? Study and wwork mostly.”

“Fun,” He says dryly. “Then what can _I_ do to pass the time.”

“Read?” You look over to the wall of books in the den. “I mean, it’s mostly history and science books, but I’m sure you can find something on that wwall.”

“Alright.” He gets up and scans the shelves, but you can tell nothing is grabbing his interest. “What do you suggest?”

“Wwell,” You sigh, getting up to scan the books with him. “I think I havve a feww novvels that havve some romance drama wwith seadwweller characters.” You locate a small section of pink-spined books off of the shelf and offer them to him. “I think they’re kinda trashy and predictable, but they make me laugh, soㅡ”

“You had me at ‘Romance Drama’.” He snatches the first book on the stack and retreats back to the couch.

    You shrug and set the rest of the stack on the table. He’s… _really_ getting into this book. You were going to head back to your study, but the face journey he’s going through with the ups and downs of the plots is just too entertaining for you. With each shocked expression and intrigued eyebrow twitch, you’re able to keep up with where he is in the story. You really weren’t expecting him to like… or possibly hate this story so much. You still don’t see what the big deal is, the story is complete garbage in your opinion, but Karkat is gripping this book with white knuckles and is already halfway through the first book! It’s only been, like, twenty minutes! He shifts so his knees are by his face and the book is resting in his lap. You doubt anything will get him out of this enthralled trance of his.

 

That is, until he yells and hurls the book at the wall. You wince as it hits the floor with a sharp _clack_. The spine is most likely dented from the impact, because the wall sure as hell is.

 

“YOU DID _NOT_ JUST END THERE! I CAN’T BELIEVE THE BOOK ENDED ON A FUUUUㅡ” He picks up a throw pillow and screams into it.

It takes him a few minutes to calm down and notice you set the series on the table for him. You brought fresh tea, but he doesn’t seem too interested in that right now. This story is the only thirst he needs quenched, apparently. He picks up the next installment and goes back to his perch, his eyes shimmering with a crimson-laced glint of excitement.

_God, you havve such bad taste in romance garbage._

You decide to get comfortable on the couch next to him. You grab a blanket and a book and settle down with your tea.

“Fuck, Kar, you read like you’vve been _starvved_ a literature.”

    He only responds with a turn of the page. He’s gone. You’re not going to get him back until he’s done with the whole thing.

 

    This is going to be a while.

 

    He continues going book to book, throwing each one at the same spot in the wall. You don’t remember much of the story, but you know how it ends, and it doesn’t end with a book. You get up and start setting up the TV before he gets to the end and goes postal. You pick up the remote just in time to dodge a book to the face.

“ _NO!_ NO NO NO! WHERE'S THE NEXT ONE?!?!?!?!?”

    You can’t help but laugh at his tantrum.

> _Cute_ <

“THAT CAN _NOT_ BE WHERE IT STOPS!” He gets up and heads to your study. “ERIDAN!” Did he seriously not see you standing right in front of him? Does he even know how long he’s been reading for?

“ERIDAN! WHERE ARE YOU!?”

“I _wwas_ right next to you.” You call back. He huffs and stomps back into the room.

“WHERE THE HE- WHERE IS THE NEXT BOOK!?”

“There _is_ no next book.”

“NO! YOU'RE _LYING_! THERE HAS TO BE! IT CAN'T END THERE!”

“Yea, that’s wwhat happened: the series ended up gettin' _so popular,_ the fanbase demanded a film a sorts and the wwriter said he’d only film the final installment, so…” You offer the remote. “Here.”

“YOU HAVE THE FILM?!” He swipes the remote so quick, he could’ve taken your arm off if you held onto the remote at all. “It probably won’t be as good as it would’ve been in a book, but I’ll take what I can get for the conclusion!”

“Wwell, wwhy wwould I keep an incomplete series? Kar, it’s been like a day; If you’re gonna binge the series, finish strong.”

“You can really be amazing sometimes, Eridan!” He eagerly sits back down on the couch, staying on the edge of his seat. You _could_ spoil the whole thing for him, but why ruin it? He presses play and leans forward.

 

A couple hours later, the credits roll. Some of the cast choices were questionable, but the actors made it work. The story wrapped up very nicely and the writer did a good job keeping the story’s direction.

“That… was one of the best movies I’ve ever seen.”

> _Happy_ <

“You liked the series?”

“‘Liked it?’” He jumps up. “That’s an understatement! I _loved_ that series!”

“Sure kept you busy for an entire day.” You smile and chuckle softly. He blinks at you.

“Wait, it’s _really_ been an entire day?”

“Yep.”

“Daㅡ I had no idea... It only felt like a few hours passed.”

> _Fast_ <

“You wwent right through them, Kar. You spared them no mercy.” You gesture to the pile of thrown books and the dented wall. “Literally.”

“Oh... I guess I did.” His face tints red. “But you can’t blame me, though! There were too many cliffhangers!”

“Wwell, howw else are you gonna get a guaranteed audience for the next installation?” You get up and head over to check out the damage.

“They could’ve used smaller cliffhangers instead of major ones that could kill someone from the wait.”

“You liked it though.” You argue, picking up the books.

“I would’ve hated it if they weren’t already done. Would’ve loved the books, but hated the way it ended and made me wait.”

“Lucky you didn’t livve _that_ hell. The wwaits wwere so long an torturous, it practically felt ILLEGAL.”

“I would have fuㅡ” He sighs. “I would’ve died after every installment.”

“Right? It’s the best wway to experience multiple deaths in such a short time.” You sit back down next to him.

“Yeah. You could probably imagine my relief when I noticed the next installment on the table after I finished the first book.”

“I wwatched you. Evvery time you got to the end, you’d practically go postal and then pick up another book. There’s a _dent_ in the wwall noww.” He blushes deeper in embarrassment.

“I'm sorry. If there’s somehow a dent in those _books_ , though, I’m _not_ sorry.” You shrug.

“Ain’t a big deal for me. I mean, I wwasn’t that big a fan a the series, but you seem to be… Hey, do you wwant them?”

His eyes get so big at that offer.

“You’re _really_ going to give me such a good series?!”

> _Happy_ <

    You push the books into his hands.

“It’s all yours.”


	7. ♋ Boredom ♋

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♋ Is it just you, or do you like to talk?

    A few hours had passed since Eridan decided to let you have such an incredible book series. He told you that he didn’t think it was all that great, which lead to a discussion on the strengths and weaknesses of the series. Well… You say “discussion”, but it was mostly you doing the talking with Eridan just listening and nodding every now and then.

“The author was a genius to put these subtle hints that point to the protagonist actually loving the troll that every other character made to look like the absolute worst troll on the planet instead of the troll who the book was heavily implying he would get withㅡ” It had only been a few minutes since you last looked at Eridan to see if he would nod in approval or say something to agree or disagree with you to keep the discussion going, but it looks like he skipped _checking_ the fuck out and went straight to _passing_ the fuck out.

“Eridan? Are you sleeping?” All you get from the seadweller is knitted brows, a groan, and a fin-coded hello. Honestly, you expected something like this. But how could he have been so tired while discussing the books? He looked fairly awake a bit ago. You shake your head dismissively, deciding not to bother thinking about it and look to your closest friend once more.

   Eridan’s head drops to the left slightly.

> _Hello_ <

_Is he coding in his sleep? Is this supposed to be the seadweller equivalent of sleep talking?_

   You decide to watch him for a bit, but his fins suddenly start moving way more than you expected; these movements are accompanied by grumbles, yet, he remains fast asleep. You were expecting simple phrases! Not full sentences or whatever he’s doing now! Quietly groaning, you start to wonder if Eridan keeps anything on his bookshelf that could maybe serve as a fin code translator. You honestly doubt it, but it never hurts to check, right?

   Carefully getting up, you make your way to the bookshelf and start searching. You absolutely refuse to touch that book written by the thinkpan-dead author, and instead start looking for a different book that could possibly hold any hope for answers. You trace your fingers along the spines of the books as you look to see what they could hold within. _History… History… Strategy… History… Combat… Strategy… No title… Strategy… History… Culture-_ **_wait_ ** _..!_ Tracing your finger back two books, you pull out the one with no title. _What could this one be about..?_

   Before you open it, you steal a glance back to Eridan, still coding away in his sleep. He seems to be coding one of the quadrants, but he’s coding so fast and you don’t know where in the code he was when you looked. The beginning? Middle? Watching closely for a few minutes, it seems to either be the flushed or the caliginous quadrant. Right when you were hoping to get a clarification on just which quadrant it was, he falls onto his side, now lying on the loungeplank.

   You groan softly to yourself; maybe he’s still coding? You go over to him, still holding the nameless book, and peer over to see what he’s doing. To your slight annoyance, it’s not the quadrant he was coding moments before, but something entirely new; something he didn’t teach you. After watching for a few moments, you determine what the pattern is.

_Down, up some, then down again. What the hell could this be?_

   Looking down at the book in your hands, you notice a bit more details other than there being no title. It’s tattered with ink stains littering the sides of some, if not most, of the pages. Eridan definitely made notes in this, and seeing as it has no title, it’s clearly one of his.

   Upon opening it, you are greeted by a surplus of diagrams and codes; when it comes to seadweller books, you’ve clearly just hit the damn jackpot! You need to start studying this book _NOW_ . Sitting down at a nearby table, you delve into the book and instantly get absorbed with getting to know more about seadweller shit so you can (hopefully) understand your friend better. It seems to start with diagrams on the respiratory system dynamics and other segments on anatomical traits exclusive to seadwellers. You had no idea he had _three_ gill sets. There’s more to seadwellers than you thought, like nocturnal anomalies and fin functions.

   There’s so much you don’t know and it’s going to take you more than one read through of this book to fully comprehend all of it, especially since you feel Eridan won’t be all too willing to teach you this shit himself. Though, his handwritten notes found all throughout the book do help slightly, so it’s kind of like he’s teaching you. Who are you kidding, no it’s not. These notes are obviously just for himself with no consideration to anyone that could possibly ever read it that _wasn’t_ him. And shit, did he really write _everything_ with a goddamn _fountain pen_ ?! You knew he was extra, but you didn’t think he’d be _that_ extra to use a fountain pen instead of a normal fucking pen! You read through the segment on fins more closely than you did the previous segments; reading so intently, so quietly… are you even in this hive anymore? You seem to be coming to the end of the chapter until you find a subsection: “ _Communication_ ”. You can feel yourself grin with a sense of accomplishment as you turn the page to find out if this could serve as some sort of translator.

   So far, no. Most of this is shit Eridan’s already taught you. Emotions, need, simple greetings and shit like that. Just when you’re about to lose hope, you see that the next few pages were left blank purposefully for notes. All of which Eridan actually filled! Your hopes are up again for a potential translation on the fin jibberish Eridan is… well, he’s not really saying shit, it’s moreso coding… whatever! You don’t care about the specifics now! You just want to know what he was coding! Looking at Eridan’s notes, there’s the quadrants you were taught, moods and simple phrases, a few different places. Holy shit, he even wrote down terms for the godtiers and even one for the game! But what’s after all those catches your eye in particular: _names_ . Now you’ll be able to know if Eridan is talking about anyone in particular if you manage to memorize it!… You don’t think it’ll be difficult for you to memorize these codes. He seems to really love the concept of tracing shapes with those fins of his, and every troll’s name is indicated by tracing horn shapes. It _had_ to be the fucking horns. You got enough antagonizing from Terezi and Vriska before and during the game, but just knowing that Eridan uses it for when he’s talking about you?! You can’t stop your eye from twitching at this annoying fact. However, it does stop when you realize something while studying the coding for your name; the tracing of your horns. _Down, up some, and down again_ . Well, not exactly _up some_ . The notes detail it to be “come up one third of the way,” but whatever. That’s not important right now. What’s important is that _THIS_ was one of the things Eridan was coding in his sleep!

   You stare at the book wide-eyed for a moment before getting up, leaving the book open on the table, and going to look at Eridan again. You whisper to yourself as you walk towards him. “What were you signing before you lied down..?” Your throat feels tight, even as you whisper that to yourself. You don’t know if you even want to know what he signed there… Either way, your face starts to dust with red as you easily start to put two and two together. You’re, however, interrupted from your thoughts as Eridan rolls over and falls face first onto the floor. Still asleep.

_Holy fuck, Eridan, you sleep like a goddamn rock._

“Ffffffffffffㅡ” Nevermind. He slowly pulls a hand to his face as he finishes what he was saying, “FUCK”

“How the heㅡ” Deep breath… “How did you even manage to fall?”

“Hold on,” The hand that was on his face jolts suddenly, accompanied by a snap. That didn’t sound great. “... Okay.” he sits up and you see that the bridge of his nose is bruised. Ouch…

“Jeez, you landed right on your face.”

“No shit,” he moves, sitting back on the loungeplank, “howw long wwas I out?”

   You shrug, “I don’t know. I was too busy reading a book to tell.”

   Well, that certainly caught Eridan’s attention, his fins perked right up. “Wwhich book?”

“A seadweller anatomy one without a title and a shㅡ” Someone just needs to put you out of your damn misery already. “And a bunch of notes in them.”

   He responds with a cough, “Oh yea…”

“It even had a section on fin code. It was a bit cheap up until those notes of yours.

   You watch as his fins drop down and twitch slightly. That’s accompanied by a light dusting of violet spreading on his cheeks. Thankfully, this sign was in the book; he’s feeling shame.

“Can I…” He pauses for a barely a moment before rephrasing. “Do you still havve it?”

“It’s on the table. Why?” No sooner had the words escaped your lips when Eridan leaps over the back of the loungeplank and makes a break for the book. All you can do is blink in shock and turn to watch him grab the book and clutch it close. He’s still signing _shame_ , but the violet dusting has grown darker

“Eridan? You alright?” You raise an eyebrow at him, watching him closely. “Are you ashamed of your notes or something?”

“ _NO_ ” Welp, if that wasn’t an obvious lie already, his fins give it away that he’s lying. That code was thankfully in the communication subsection.

“Why the heㅡ” _Sigh…_ “Why are you ashamed of your notes? They were pretty interesting.”

“They’re personal, I guess… Like I said, first time someone’s _ACTUALLY_ interested in this kinda shit.”

“Well, you already told me about the whole quadrant signs and you seem to have made that one. Doesn’t Feferi know about all these too?”

“Wwell, I mean, yea,” His eyes stay busy on the bookshelf. “But wwhen it’s a _land_ dwweller learnin’ _sea_ dwweller shit, I can’t help but wwonder howw much you think I’m makin’ it up.”

“Well, considering they were in books that you had no plans on showing to a landdweller, I doubt it.” With that, Eridan doesn’t retort. The only thing coming from him is glubs. “What?”

“Nothin’. I don’t knoww wwhy I’m gettin like this wwith you.” He’s still clutching that tattered book close to him, taking a hand through his hair. Is he nervous or something?

“I think I might have a guess...” You mutter under your breath, but quickly dismiss this. “Whateverㅡ” you would’ve continued, but a yawn cuts you off. Damn, looks like your thinkpan is finally exhausted after a day of binging that incredible book series, that rollercoaster of emotions that it was, the one sided debate with Eridan, and learning a bit more of the fin code. You’re glad you already put those books and movie into your captchalog.

“Do you wwanna go back to your hivve now? I could lend you my lusus for the trip.”

   Well, that’s one way to return to your hive. Why the hell did he wait so fucking long to suggest it!? Whatever, it’s not like you didn’t enjoy your time here so far. You honestly missed spending time with your best friend…

“Oh, well… I probably should go then. Less risk of me swearing when I’m alone than around literally anyone.”

“I mean, I think you’re doin’ pretty wwell for someone who relies on it.” He shrugs.

“Are you fuㅡ” Oh no, can’t do it now. “Are you kidding me? I almost slipped up after every daㅡ” Nope. You refuse. “After every book! _AND_ I had to bite my fu ㅡ ” _someone kill me now. Please._ “My hand when Meenah threw her da ㅡ ” _groan_ “her trident through the window!” Despite your anger flaring, you yawn again.

“But you _didn’t_ swwear.”

“I know I didn’t. But I came way too close for comfort.”

“At any rate, I’m here for you to get through this, Kar.” And there it is. He signed your name with his fins. You can’t stop your eye from twitching. You decide to ask about his choice of name codes later as you let out yet another yawn.

“Either way, as much as I’d love to go back to my hive and not risk swearingㅡ” You try to keep this yawn in, and it works, kinda. “I think I’ll just fall asleep and fall off your lusus if I try now. I’ll just stay hereㅡ” _yawn_ “for a nap…”

“Couch or recuperacoon?”

“Like I’m going in your da- recuperacoon.” You head to the loungeplank and lie down.

“Alright, wwell…”

   You turned to face him, expecting him to say something else, but you only catch him coding your name as he turns and heads upstairs and out of sight. You shake your head; it’s not important now.

“Whatever.”

 

   Wait… didn’t Eridan leave a snuggleplane nearby? When he set the book series on the table? You get up and your memory was correct! You grab the snuggleplane and wrap it around yourself before lying back down. It takes some time before you’re fully comfortable, but once you are, sleep quickly claims you.

 

\-      ♋    ♋    ♋     -

 

   You’re startled awake by the sensation of falling, your eyes flying open to see the floor quickly approaching, “SHIㅡ!” You have never been so grateful for the floor before now; you can almost kiss it for saving your ass. Literally. You probably would’ve kissed the floor if it weren’t for two things. One, you’re in a shit mood now, and two, you hear footsteps coming into the livingblock.

“You’re awwake.”

“Yeah, I’m up.” You grumble, throwing the snuggleplane back on the loungeplank.

   You feel like he’s smirking down at you as he moves to sit down. “You knoww you’re makin’ a big deal out of this for nothin’, right?”

   Oh, how you wish you could call bullshit on him right now. “My day almost started with me being unable to get up and my aㅡ” god damn, you really need to calm down...  “and my backside vibrating harder than Alternia did during The Reckoning!”

   He laughs at your annoyed mood. “I think this plight is easily avvoidable.”

   Yep, there it is; your eye is twitching now. “How? I can’t exactly take it out without somehow making my aㅡ without it making a hole large enough to fit the Grand Highblood!”

> _Cute_ <

   Your eye twitches a touch more violently at that code.

“So, you mean to tell me… You _nevver_ set yourself a plan B for swwearin’? Not once? No consideration?”

“Clearly, it never occurred to me that something would ever fuㅡ would ever render me unable to swear, Eridan!”

“You wweren’t close to Fef, so I get that. Evver notice howw little she swwore?”

“Yeah. I thought she just didn’t like swearing,” you shrug.

“Yea, wwell, she didn’t like me doin’ it too much either. Had to dance around it.”  
That’s not exactly surprising to learn, but… “Wow. Sounds like the heiress was more spoiled than I thought if she actually fuㅡ” _Deep breaths…_ “if she actually made you not swear around her. Talk about a stick up her aㅡ…” _sigh_.

“Her craww?”

“ **_Do. Not._ ** ”

“Could you really do anythin’ about it? She was the fuckin’ heiress. So if she tossed me aside for some scummy mustardblood, then she got wwhat she wwanted.”

“You definitely knew her better than me or anyone else, so I don’t really know how she was, heiress-wise. Other than the fact that she was too daㅡ too peppy. How are you supposed to lead or rule anything while being so happy all the time!?”

“Exactly. Then again, I kneww she wwas awwful. That’s wwhy I wwas more open wwith you than her.” You can’t help but let a smile the tiniest of bits; this knowledge, albeit obvious and clearly not new, managed to brighten your day. If only by the tiniest fraction. “You _GOT_ things. Didn’t just giggle and brush it aside like a fuckin’ joke.”

“Or make literally everything a fish pun.”

“That’s not evven a quirk! It’s just stupid. But if anything stuck, it wwas me forcin’ myself into her punny shit _EVVERY_ time wwe spoke. And evven wwhen I’d ask her not to, she did it anyway.”

“So not only a bad heiress, but a terrible friend, huh?”

“It’s the one thin’ that stuck.” He gets up, starting to walk to his researchblock, “Followw me.”

   Your eyebrow raises as you get up to follow him,

“And what are you going to show me?” He heads to his computer and opens up Trollian; opening an old log.

“Take a fuckin’ look: This is her breakin’ our pale quadrant with _NO_ fuckin’ grace.” As if to put emphasis on it, Eridan circles the text with his finger on the screen.

   You read the exchange closely, but quickly. Holy shit, did that bitch watch, read or even hear about break ups in any form of fucking media?! “And no fuㅡ no tact either. Jeez… This really puts her in a new light. She acts like she cares, but then she goes and breaks your moraillegance without any consideration for your emotions? She’s worse than that biㅡ than the troll that book series you gave me was trying to get with the protagonist.”

“Not to mention, she fuckin’ _lied_ to me!” He tries to imitate Feferi, even over-exaggerating his fin movements; it’d be amusing if this was in a different conversation. “I’m so tired, I don’t havve room to think about the quadrants.” Just before you get a headache from a mere imitation of the heiress, Eridan reverts to his usual self (thank fuck). “She’s _so_ full a shit! She wwas all _ovver_ Sol right after that chat!”

   So that chat happened right before you failed to get Sollux in the game? Wait... Feferi appeared shortly after that and kissed his corpse! You feel yourself getting annoyed, and not just because you already know you’re not going to be able to phrase anything the way you want to in this moment. “Man… She really is worse than that character… Talk about zero fuㅡ zero empathy for anyone…”

“Can you blame me for not bein’ as open wwith her as I wwas wwith you?”

“Considering how much of an optimistic, happy-go-lucky, inconsiderate bitㅡ **_heiress_ ** she is,” you just say that word through your teeth out of anger of being unable to call her a bitch at the moment. “No, I don’t blame you. Jeez. I’m a fuㅡ I’m an aㅡ I’m **_me_ ** and I am somehow a better friend than **_her_ **. Seriously, what the heㅡ what’s her deal?”

“Like I told you before, Kar: You _get_ me. No pun intended, but she wwas alwways in her owwn bubble.”

   You can’t help but let out a small chuckle at that. You can feel yourself cheering up a bit more discussing this with Eridan. “Obviously. At least I _tried_ to understand everyone. Even when I didn’t really get them, I tried my daㅡ my best to get an idea.”

   Eridan smiles a bit now. Was it because you laughed? Or because you’re agreeing with him? You can’t exactly tell; he’s been hard to read since you got here.

“An that’s wwhat made you a pretty fuckin’ great leader.”

“Thanks.” You lower your voice at your next comment, looking to the screen instead of at Eridan, “still ended up failing in the end.”

“But…” You look back at him. “I do think you are pretty hard on yourself sometimes.”

   You roll your eyes. “Well that much is obvious. My past and future selves were hard on me, too. But I guess that doesn’t count because they were all, you know, _me_.”

“No, not _wwere_ . I said you _ARE_. Like, right now. Presently.”

   You cross your arms, rolling your eyes the other way this time, an annoyed expression crossing your face.

“I know. That’s just how I am, I guess. I always have been.” You shrug. “Not only was I the epitome of a disappointment of a troll to my lusus because I couldn’t come close to living up to the enormous expectation my ancestor laid out for me, I was also the disappointment of a lifetime to everyone because I couldn’t be an incredible leader like my ancestor. I failed everyone in just about every aspect during the game. I couldn’t get Sollux into the game in time, which caused him to die in the first place, it took me at least three times longer to climb my echeladder than everyone else, and even _then_ , Terezi had to help me, because I wasn’t strong enough to take down the imps after my own lusus was prototyped into them. And that was the first prototype! You can imagine how much more pathetic I got after everyone else’s lusus and a _frog_ got added to the mix! After that, there were those stupid memos a future me had made that everyone could see pretty much whenever unless it was time for that specific memo. Which ended up being a ‘hey, let’s mess with Karkat while he tries to make an important memo’ session. Brilliant idea _that_ was. Not to mention I didn’t even think to stop doing those memos after the second or third one turned out like that. Why? Because I thought what I had to say was important, but clearly, everyone felt differently and just ignored my memo. God those things were a mistake. I even kept doing them on that meteor! They were pointless! All of them! Oh! Right! Then, I told Kanaya to just give up on making the true Genesis Frog because her dumb Denizens made an impossible request before it would tell her where to find the frog to make it! And in doing that, I told her to use just a plain old frog that she had ready! And wouldn’t you know it? _THAT IS WHAT CAUSED EVERYTHING BAD TO HAPPEN IN THE FIRST PLACE! BECAUSE I DID THAT, I ROBBED US OUR ENDGAME! OUR PRIZE! I. GAVE. A. UNIVERSE._ ** _CANCER!!!_** That was my big shining moment! Oh! But it doesn’t end there! Because this is me we’re talking about! Of course it can’t end there! After the humans’ Jack came and Aradia literally threw us into the lab on that meteor, I failed to keep everyone together! I failed to keep everyone calm! I failed to even make sure everyone respected each other’s _private portal block things_. Then, Gamzee went missing, you had your culling spree, that I probably could’ve stopped if I had talked to you more or calmed you down more because you were clearly on edge for the past few days at that point, but no. I was too busy juggling millions of other things and I refused to ask anyone for help when that would’ve been the smart thing to do! I’m pretty sure my panicked memo and breaking our pact with you right after that probably helped lead to you losing your mind too. After that, Gamzee going sober and on his own killing spree, Vriska killing Tavros, Terezi killing Vriska. All of that would have been avoided if I was more attentive as a leader and actually dealt out tasks for everyone to do so that they stayed busy and not at each other’s throats! And oh yeah! Sometime during that time on the meteor, Terezi broke up our matespritship because I kept getting on her nerves and she just couldn’t stand me anymore because of how I am about literally everything. How did she put it again? Oh right! I was too bossy and had a chip on my nub that would just not smooth out and she just couldn’t handle it anymore! Me being me is what pushed her away! Nothing else! Just me literally being myself! And then later, she got with Strider! Because Strider is _obviously_ so much better than I am! Not bossy, goes with the flow, relaxed! And my moirallegiance with Gamzee didn’t last long either! He pretty much broke it off shortly after the humans came on board our little meteor lab! And do you know why? It’s because he started a kismesis with my ex-matesprit! And of course, Gamzee was extremely toxic to Terezi, and I thought about playing auspistice, but no! I figured Kanaya would be on that, because that’s usually kind of her _thing_. But no, I didn’t notice how deep and busy in the red she was with that Rose human to bother being ashen for Terezi and Gamzee! So there was no one there at all to keep things from being too toxic between them! And that lead to Terezi’s self-destruction! That was one hundred percent my fault! If I had been her and Gamzee’s auspistice, if I had been a better friend, she wouldn’t have had such a downward spiral that lead her to ask Vriska’s dancestor to bring her sight back, get hooked on faygo and just utterly destroy herself! That would have never happened if it weren’t for **_me!_** Everything wrong that happened in the game was **_my_** fault! Everything wrong that happened between everyone socially could ultimately be traced back to being **_my_** fault! My own self-hate was immediately obvious to those humans too! Even with their miniscule understanding on everything I, and everyone else, went through and with absolutely no knowledge of  our culture, immediately knew that I was a self-loathing, being that would have been better off either being culled immediately after hatching or never hatching at all! Me hating myself was so obvious, Jade, the human that I am almost positive spaced out the most, actually pointed it out and suggested I hate marry myself! Because the **_endless_** cycle of my self-loathing and being hard on myself is going to be a thing that never _fucking_ ㅡ”


	8. ♒️ An Honest Mistake ♒️

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♒️ Everyone is bothering you for everything all the time. Can't you just be left alone?

“And you wwere doin’ so wwell, too…”

    You don’t understand how things got this way. Why you’re the one being forced to endure an endless cycle of false securities and torment, whether it’s being directed at you or not. But you sure as hell didn’t want to have to wrigglersit Karkat and his… unfortunate situation. But hey, you were right: he couldn’t _not_ swear and now he’s doing his damnest to keep his composure. Karkat falls to his knees, hands covering his mouth. All the while, you sit down at your desk and groan, rubbing your face as you try to think of a plan.

 

_I’m not getting much of a choice here. I could just ditch him in the sea, but that won’t fix the problem._

    He falls onto his side and begins to writhe on the floor, biting his lip to stay quiet.

_You could search for Kankri or Cronus, but you don’t intend on doing that._

    His breath hitches in his throat and his face is tinting red in embarrassment.

_You’ll risk injury if you try pulling it out._

    He’s struggling to crawl to you, hanging his head.

_You don’t have any other choice here._

 

    Your train of thought is interrupted when he firmly grips your ankle. He hugs your leg in an effort to support himself as he chokes out his plea.

“Eridanㅡ” He lets a lewd groan slip. “Help m-me.” You wince as his claws sink deeper into you.

 _You_ really _don’t have any other choice._

“Kar, you gotta stay wwith me.” You hush him, prying his hands off of you and forcing him up on his knees. “Look at me.” You kneel down in front of him, giving him a moment to look at you. He’s trying his best to keep composure, but it’s growing more and more difficult each second you don’t help.

“Are you _absolutely sure_ it wwas a plug?” He’s only able to nod in response, his face growing redder at this admission.

> _Shame_ <

“Okay, look. I might be able to help you turn it off.” You let go of his hands and grab his shoulders, tilting your head to ensure he’s looking at you. “But if this is gonna wwork, you _havve_ to listen to me.” And he nods. “And I mean **exactly** as I say, no questions. You can platonically hate me after this all you wwant, you can loathe me to my death” you hold his head in your hands. “but you do NOT take this out on yourself. Do you understand?” He hesitates this time, but he still agrees.

“Alright,”

   You sigh, letting go. _Let’s get it over with_. You get up and return to your chair, reclining with your legs spread in a more dominant manner.

“Come here.”

    You sit in wait, watching Karkat struggle to stand. When he finally makes his way to you, he’s walking like he just molted. One hand rests in your propped arm, the other restlessly tapping in the arm of your chair. As difficult as this must be for him, you can’t offer him or coddle him. You have to keep a cold exterior, you have to keep your distance.

“Don’t wwaste my time, Vvantas,” your head tilts down as you scowl at him, your hand gesturing your command. “Come. Here.” Which causes him to stumble into your hold, barely catching himself. You huff in agitation and roughly pull him up onto your lap by his waist, having him straddle you.

“Wwas that so hard?” You can tell he wants to bitch at you, but all you get is an unexpectedly loud moan. “Keep your hands on my shoulders.” And he does so. “Do wwhat you havve to to not fall, but touch my fins or gills” you growl. “And I leavve you on the floor to wwrithe.” He grips your shoulders tighter and quickly nods.

_Get on with it._

    A soft, guttural growl rumbles in your throat as you clamp down on your victim’s neck, not enough to bleed, but enough that he’llㅡ

“HEYㅡ” Another moan as he tries to pull away. “FUCK! _AH!_ ” Another swear, the vibration grows stronger. Despite his protest, you’re careful to not let him fall. Better yet, you adjust your posture so he comes closer. He needs to loosen up, though. You slowly rock your hips in some effort to grind against him. Finally, his posture wilts as he moans and sighs in your hold, pressing flush against you. Perhaps he’ll relax enough to...

_That’s it..._

    You push him away just enough that you can smooth your left hand up Karkat’s chest to the zipper of his pants and seamlessly pull it down. You let your hand rest by the band of his boxers, but he only grinds into your palm, groaning and whining for you to proceed.

_I cannot believe I’m being forced into this again._

You slip under the band and grip his bulge as you slowly stroke. He shivers in your hold from the chill of your rings, but you disregard it and continue your barrage of biting and licking from his neck to his shoulder. He leans back with a louder moan, but you catch him with your right hand against his back. He grips harder into your shoulders, words quivering in his throat.

“You gotta keep goin’, Kar.” You mumble into his skin. “Keep swwearin’.” He doesn’t even hesitate after you give this order, letting his colorful language pour from his mouth like a busted dam. Each swear and curse just makes the vibrator work harder and get stronger inside of him. You just hope he’s not sincerely getting off to that. He needs to not focus on it at all. What he _needs_ to do…

“Look at me Kar.” You pull away and stare at him through furrowed brows. “Givve into the jolts” your thumb flicks over the tip of his bulge before you pick up the pace in stroking and grinding him. All of this friction is starting to get to you. Has it always been so hot in here? You can feel the color rush to your cheeks with his display. If you keep this up, you might let your bulge unsheathe and… _No_ , no no. This isn’t about you, this is about you helping a friend. You don’t want to get attached to him anyway, not like this. You shake your head and get back to the task at hand. You must’ve been thinking on this for a while, because he mumbled something and you missed it completely. “Wwhat do you wwant?”

“Damnit,” You’re having difficulty keeping his twitching bulge in your hand. “I-I want more, you dickmongering fuck!” He takes his hands off your shoulders and grabs your head, slamming his mouth into yours into a poor excuse of a kiss. It feels more like he’s trying to force his moans down your throat. You bite at his bottom lip and press your forehead against his in hopes for a chance to fucking breathe.

“Fuck, Eridan, Iㅡ”

“Ride it ‘til you can’t hold it no moreㅡ” Is all you can get out until he’s ‘kissing’ you again. You try to help him with his form this time around, but he’s moaning and swearing too much to focus on that. He’s gripping you too hard, you think he’s going to start pulling your hair out. Ow. Ow. _Fuckin’ ow! Finish already!_

    And suddenly, he goes stiff in your hold with a loud moan, genetic material spurting between the two of you, most of it in your hand. He sighs and goes limp against you, panting and riding out the aftershock. Your left hand is still being held by his bulge, weaving and wrapping between your fingers. Your right hand slowly drifts down to the small of his back, waiting for him to fall quiet…

    You press your emblem ring firmly against his back. After a few seconds…

 

“There. Noww just relax.”

 

   Finally: _Silence._

 

   The vibrator is finally off. And yet, you still hear a faint hum coming from the troll in your arms. You pull him away enough to get a look at him: his face is tinted red and his hair is an outstanding mess. His eyes are heavy and struggling to stay open, but once he looks back at you, the humming gets louder. _Is he purring?_ No no no, _please_ don’t let him get attached to you like this. His eyes close and he moves to press his face into your chestㅡ

    You immediately stand with him in your hold and set him down in your chair. He groans in protest, but he sits up and zips his pants. You walk away to give yourself some space and try to straighten yourself up and comb your hand through...

    You dipshit, now there’s Vantas material in your hair.

“How… How did you turn it off?” He breathes.

“Don’t ask.”

“Eridan.”

“Please don’t ask.”

“You made a _pact_ …” He softly warns. He’s starting to return to normal. “How do you have a way of turning it off, and yet you couldn’t have just done that for me sooner?”

“This ring” you point to your emblem ring “is a fake.” You return to his side and open the top of the decoy ring, exposing something of a sensory chip. “See? It’s a sensor. I’vve had this for a wwhile noww.”

“Why?”

_Shit._

“So I havve a different vversion from the one I…” You clear your throat. You stand up, close your ring, and back away from Karkat once more.

> _Shame_ <

“Why didn’t you just turn it off when it activated?”

“It only turns off if the… ‘user’ has been satisfied.” He gets up, a concerned look on his face.

“This whole things has to do with what happened between you and your dancestor, doesn’t it?”

He’s getting better at reading you. Or maybe he always _was_ good at seeing you for how you were, even if you didn’t want to talk about it. Oh _why_ did he have to get dragged into your shit? Why _him_? You cross your arms and try to stay stoic.

“So wwhat if it does?”

“It’s not like I’m asking for the details here,” he scoffs. “Besides, you kinda answered my question anyway, so I’ll drop it.”

   You nod and stride for the door, but he grabs your wrist.

“...Thank you, by the way… for stopping it.” What, he can’t even look at you when expressing his gratitude?

“Yeah, wwell… wwhat else wwas I gonna do? Just let the choir a torturous ecstasy echo throughout my hivve until the Outer Gods knoww wwhen?”

“Regardless,” He lets go… and looks at you. “thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.” You proceed out of the study, heading to the bathroom to wash the dried material out of your hair.

 

\-     ♒     ♒     ♒     -

 

“Are you really going to be doing work while I read?” Karkat gripes as you carry him to the couch. “What do you even work on?”

“Didn’t say I wwas wworkin’,” You clarify as you set him down. “But readin’ ain’t wwork.” You hand him a book which he glares at before snatching it.

“Whatever.” And with that, he’s quiet! No more questions or complaints or arguments! He actually looks pretty content when he’s not throwing a hissy fit over an inconclusive plot. Maybe you could sit down andㅡ

 _Don’t you even consider it_.

    You turn and resume your work in the study. For a few hours, the only sound to echo through your hive is the clack of your keyboard and the faint page turn. But eventually, you hear the soft _paf_ of a book close and a sigh before Karkat’s in the doorway. The alone time was nice while you had it.

“Hey Eridan?”

“Hm.”

    You hear a knock.

“Wwhat is it?”

“That wasn’t me.”

   Another knock against your window. You’re willing to bet 50 Boonbucks on who that could be, but you groan and check anyway.

It’s Meenah again. _Back already?_

“You better not break another fuckin’ wwindoww.” But she rears back, trident in hand. “Wwoman, I swwear to _Cod_.” You open the window before she even gets the chance.

“Thanks,” She props her weapon against the window pane. “I didn’t reely want to come intide, so Imma keep this quick.” Her hand fidgets in her pocket and pulls out a small remote. “First off, I’ve got the remote to crabby’s butt thing.”

“That’s good.” Karkat sighs. He comes closer to take the remote, but…  

“But I also think cape cod-sucker here mighta been in on this whole no swearin’ fin.” Is she being serious?

“Wwhat makes you think that?” You scoff, crossing your arms.

“Think about it,” she looks passed you. “Why can Ampora turn that fin on and off, nubs?”

“Wwe ain’t discussin’ this noww.” You snap.

“That ain’t for you to decide,” she snaps right back. “To be plank, it’s a little weird that Cronus would even be able to know if you swore at all...” She hums in thought. “If only someone here had a flipperin’ ring with some kind of sensor in it, I don’t knowㅡ”

“Okay, it only turns it _off_ , for one thing.” you argue.

“Oh, so you have a magic ‘turns fins off’ ring, is that it?”

“Magic ain’t real!” > _Annoy < _“Howw many fuckin’ times I gotta say it?!”

“Don’t you fucking code at me!” She codes it right back at you. “How did you make it so you could turn off somefin you ain’t ever seen before, fish nerd?”

“That ain’t your damn business!”

“Unless maybe,” She gets nose to nose with you, knitting her brows. “This _ain’t_ the first time you’ve gone rootin’ around inside a crabs over here.” _How fucking dare…_

“Fuck off.” You turns away and go back to your desk, but Karkat takes your place and stands next to that damn sea witch.

“Typical,” she tuts. “Defensive as a dugong…” She shrugs. “Waterever, it ain’t none a my business.”

“...So, can I get that remote now?” You see him reach for it before she even responds.

“Shore.” And yet she pulls it closer to herself.

“Oh right, didn’t you want to make us buy that off of you?”

“Whale, that’s between me and him, in’t it?” And she tosses you the remote. Karkat sighs and grumbles in response.

“Sea ya!”

   And with that she leaves, Karkat closing the window. You set the remote on your desk and go back to typing.

“You’re just going to ignore all of that happened?”

“Wwhat is there to talk about, Kar?” You don’t take your focus off the screen.

“Her accusation, your paymentㅡ” You hear a window break elsewhere in the hive. “... the fact she probably broke another one of your fenestration panels?”

“There’s _nothin’_ to discuss,” you groan. “wwhat, do you wwant the remote? Take it.” you pick it up and shove it into his hands. You rub your temples and try to calm down.

“Thanks, but that’s not exactly what I’m talking about right now.” Regardless, he keeps it in his hands. You assume it’s a precaution for in case he swears again. “What’s wrong?” he continues before you can even answer; he knows you too damn well… “and don’t you dare say nothing because I know something’s up. You would’ve normally bi-” despite having the remote, he won’t take the risk. “Would’ve normally complained about Meenah saying what she did and breaking another panel. Something’s wrong, so what is it? Talk to me.”

“Kar,” you rub your face. “I’m just really fuckin’ tired a all a this shit.” You turn to him. “It’s wworn me out… and I thought I wwas done wwith all a this a long time ago but” You laugh dryly. “ _Apparently_ I can’t livve out the rest a my life in solitude like I wanted. No! I havve to havve evveryone and their sloppily-branded pawws in my schedule!” You get up and head for the door, but you stop. “So, you knoww wwhat I’m gonna do?” You walk back to the mouthy little troll that’s been a spur in your gills since he got here. “I’m gonna take you back to your hivve and wwe’ll _nevver_ havve to discuss _any_ a this again. Got it?”

“While I am fine with going back to my hive to avoid me slipping up again, because, remote or not, I’d rather not feel it vibrating for even a moment,” he frowns, “there’s no way you really _wanted_ to live the rest of your life in solitude…” is he being genuinely sympathetic now? Or is he just prying into your psyche again? “There’s no way you’re serious about that.”

“I didn’t,” you mutter. “But I do noww.” You whistle for your lusus. “Let’s go.” And you head outside, a reluctant Vantas eventually meeting you there as you saddle onto Skyhorsedad’s back.

“Why?” He walks up to Skyhorsedad, but does not get on yet.

“Wwhy don’t you swwear evven though you havve the remote?” You growl, patience burned at both ends. “Shut the fuck up and get up here before I make you swwim back to your hivve.”

   He just stares at you for a bit, almost like he’s studying your expression and trying to figure out what’s eating you. God, why the hell does he have to be like this? There’s no way he actually cares. He just wants the satisfaction of knowing everything. After a moment, he sighs and starts to climb on. “Fine.” He mutters now, “I don’t even know which way my hive is…”

“It’s gonna be a wwhile,” you snap the reigns. “Think you can keep your bitchin’ dowwn to a minimum until wwe get there?”

   You feel his hands rest on the saddle; well, what bit of saddle he can even hold onto. “I’ll do what I can.”

   You continue on in silence. You remember Karkat inviting you out to his hive shortly after your revival, but you’ve never really made the journey out here. You’re surprised how far inland he is. You’d think with this new planet he wouldn’t hide himself away, but maybe this is the kind of life he’s used to? You can definitely relate; you did much of the same with your hive location. It’s pretty quiet out here. Lots of foliage and he’s so close to civilization. Then again, who’s to say he leaves his hive all that often? It takes several hours, enough to get close to day break, but you end up finding his hive and dropping him off.

“Hey,” He starts as he moves to get off your lusus, “The sun’s almost up. You’re welcome to stay the day so you don’t have to risk literally frying in the sun. I’m sure I can convince my lususㅡ”

“It’s fine,” You interject, rubbing your thumbs harshly into the reigns, gripping a bit tighter. “I’ll be fine.”

“I doubt that. It took hours to get here. There’s no way you’ll get back to your hive before the sun rises.” _Don’t risk it, don’t be an idiot and take his offer._

“Wwatch me.”

   You snap the reigns and your head back without so much as a goodbye. Your lusus, however, doesn’t seem to be going as fast as he should be. It’s not like him to tire from such a short walk. Karkat’s not with you anymore, he should be able toㅡ

“Hey, swveetheart. You havwe a minute to talk?”

    You grab Cronus by the neck and jump from Skyhorsedad’s back and onto the ground.

 

    Your vision is swallowed by a thick plume of black. You remember nothing after that.


	9. ♋ The Headless Waltz ♋

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♋ Where something good comes from people bugging you for once!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t forget to check out the story playlist; it definitely comes into play for this Chapter! -bellmandi86

    It’s been two wipes since Eridan dropped you off at your hive and you have heard nothing from him since. In fact, Trollian’s been quite for ages; no one really seems to want to talk to you. You can’t blame them, though. You know you’re usually a headache to the recipient; they usually are to you as well, but it really depends on who’s trolling you. Kanaya isn’t a headache, but she’s probably too busy doing whatever with Rose to chat with you andㅡ

    Your thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a low, but loud, growl coming from your mealblock. Damn it, you lost track of time while staring at your Trollian account; your late for feeding your lusus, and his relentless insistence on a sparring session before you even feed him. Seriously, why does he still do that? It’s not like you’re in _that_ much danger on this new planet! Grabbing your sickles, you head down to your mealblock to pacify your crabby lusus and feed him.

    The whole annoying ordeal takes little over ten minutes. Returning to your respiteblock, you hope, but doubt, you have a Trollian notification. Lo and behold, your doubt was correct. There’s seriously nothing to fucking do here and no one to really talk to. Sure you have shelves upon shelves of books and a whole block dedicated to movies, but you’ve already read every book you own at _least_ a hundred times… _including the damn ~ATH book for fuck’s sake_ , and seen each movie at least a dozen times. And sure, you’ve got a few neighbors, but they’re all so fucking retarded, you can’t hold a conversation with them without wanted to get into a fight. And just like when you were on Alternia, your overprotective lusus would always arrive to carry you away, back to your hive. It gets really fucking embarrassing, but you guess it’s just a force of habit for him. This, however, doesn’t stop you from starting to believe you’re about to fucking die of boredom.

    “Maybe I should’ve borrowed more books from Eridan…” glancing at your monitor, you debate with yourself on whether you should contact him or not. Sure, he said he wanted to live in isolation, but there’s no way that’s fucking true. He’s obviously bullshitting you, but you can’t put your finger on why. “Damniㅡ” a moan slips from your mouth as the assplug from hell activates. You forgot about the damn thing! “Fuck!” You really need to find a loophole. Pulling the remote out of your captcha, you immediately turn the damn thing off. How the hell are you expected to last a whole damn sweep? Face flushed from the sensation, you slam your head into your desk at this realization. You almost wish the damn Grand Highblood just removed your fucking tongue from your mouth. Almost.

    Shoving that realization to the side, you start thinking. _Maybe I can get away with swearing on Trollian. I won’t be saying them, so it_ **_shouldn’t_ ** _activate the thing, right?_ With that, you decide to kill two featherbeasts with one stone. Moving to your desk, you begin to troll. You hope he actually answers instead of making this be some retarded, one sided conversation

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

CG: HEY, LET’S TALK FOR A BIT.  
CA: for someone that wwants to livve the next swweep in solace youre awwful quick to contact me  
CA: but in case you forgot  
CA: i aint too eager on bein social either so  
CA: wwhat do you fuckin wwant

    Holy shit, he already sounds annoyed with you.

CG: I’M REGRETTING THIS ALREADY.  
CG: AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN *I’M* BEING EAGER? I HAVEN’T SPOKEN TO YOU IN TWO WIPES. I KNOW YOU HAVE YOUR CAGEY WHATEVER THAT MAKES YOU NEED TO SULK ON YOUR LONELY ISLAND FOR *REASONS*, BUT AT LEAST YOU HAVE IT EASY.  
CG: I CAN'T SWEAR. PERIOD.  
CG: AT LEAST NOT VERBALLY, ANYWAY.  
CA: do I wwant to ask  
CG: NO, BECAUSE I’M GOING TO TELL YOU ANYWAY. SO FAR, I’VE ONLY BEEN POLICING HOW I TALK, BUT I DON’T KNOW ABOUT WRITTEN WORD.  
CA: is being able to swwear really wworth the gamble kar  
CA: wwait  
CA: you havve the remote right  
CG: I WOULDN'T EVEN BE ONLINE IF I DIDN'T. I WOULD BE A MESS RIGHT NOW WITH NO WAY OF GETTING A HOLD OF ANYONE, INCLUDING YOU.  
CA: you givve trollian too much credit  
CA: you can swwear on your owwn  
CG: YES, BUT IT STILL ACTIVATES THE DEVICE. EVEN IF I CAN TURN IT OFF IMMEDIATELY, IT IS STILL REALLY ANNOYING FOR IT TO ACTIVATE AT ALL.  
CA: you really wwant wwritten record of this convversation?  
CG: ....  
CG: NO.  
CG: BUT I STILL NEED TO TEST IT FOR A POTENTIAL LOOPHOLE, THOUGH.  
CA: let me givve you somethin to wwork wwith then  
CA: you nubby horned bitch wwriggler  
CG: I FIND IT PATHETIC THAT YOU CALL THAT A DECENT INSULT. SOMETIMES, I SWEAR, YOU CAN BE SUCH AN EVASIVE NOOKSUCKLING SHITWEASEL.

    You pause with your fingers hovering just over a few keys. A few moments pass and you let out a sigh; loophole found!

CG: OKAY. I CAN SWEAR AS LONG AS IT'S NOT VERBAL.  
CA: is that really all it takes to piss you off  
CA: just poke fun at your horns  
CG: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK, YOU BITCHING DOUCHECRUMPET?  
CA: wwoww okay sensitivve  
CG: WHO TOLD YOU THAT??  
CA: told me wwhat  
CG: ...  
CA: do I evven need to tell you wwhat im signin  
CG: FOR THE LOVE OF A VAPID MOTHERFUCKER! WHY IS *THAT* EVEN YOUR FIN LANGUAGE FOR ME!? WHY COULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN SOMETHING ELSE!?  
CA: wwell fuck wwould you rather i wwas more exaggerated wwith it  
CG: NO! I WOULD RATHER IT BE SOMETHING ELSE ENTIRELY!  
CA: an wwhy wwould it be your say to tell me howw to change a code you cant evven speak

_Fucking groan…_

CG: I DON'T KNOW? BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING INSULTING IN ITSELF?!  
CA: insultin  
CG: YOU KNOW, THE ONLY ONE THAT REALLY DOESN'T MAKE FUN OF MY DAMN HORNS IS MY OVERLY SENSITIVE DANCESTOR!  
CG: I AM PRETTY SURE EVERYONE ELSE HAS CALLED MY HORNS *NUBS* OR THE LIKE AT LEAST ONCE!  
CG: IT'S LIKE PEOPLE CALLING YOUR “SCIENCE” *MAGIC*.  
CA: okay theres a difference  
CA: it IS science  
CA: but your horns are  
CA: wwithout a doubt  
CA: nubby

    It’s like he’s _trying_ to piss you off.

CG: YOUR *SCIENCE* COMES OUT OF A FUCKING *MAGIC WAND*, ERIDAN!  
CG: IT'S FUCKING MAGIC.  
CA: YOUR HORNS ARE NUBBY KAR  
CA: wwhether you like it or not  
CA: that is FACT  
CG: YOU DON'T THINK I FUCKING KNOW THAT, YOU PRETENTIOUS BULGEHUMPING FUCKJAM?!  
CA: youre one to talk about bein a bulgehumpin fuckjam kar

    Your eye twitches as you feel a blush come to your face.

CG: NO! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO HOLD THAT SHAMELESS DEGRADATION OF MY COMPOSURE OVER MY HEAD, YOU PROBING REPULSIVE KRINGLEFUCK!!  
CA: frankly kar i found the wwhole display to be  
CA: quite adorable

    You snap at this, actually yelling at your poor husktop, “I AM _NOT_ FUCKING ADORA ㅡFUCK!” You fall out of your chair when the device activates. You got too caught up in the damn moment, the thing slipped your mind _again!_ It takes a minute or two for you to turn it off and compose yourself once more. However, it seems you don’t get the chance to retort before Eridan could send another message. You’re too late, he sent one while you were still on the damn floor.

CA: speechless i knoww  
CG: I AM ***NOT*** ADORABLE, YOU APESHITTING ASSCACTUS!!  
CG: AND NO! I WAS NOT SPEECHLESS!  
CG: I ACTUALLY FUCKING YELLED AT MY HUSKTOP!!  
CA: still cant contain yourself  
CA: thought wwhat already happened wwas enough for you

    You’re groaning so much, your lusus is getting agitated.

CG: I HAD TO TURN THE DAMN THING OFF AND COMPOSE MYSELF AGAIN BEFORE RESPONDING, YOU FUCKSHITTING VILE NOOKPIMPLE!  
CA: uh huh  
CG: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK I WAS EVEN DOING?!  
CA: im assumin nothin an you cant provve me otherwwise  
CG: I FUCKING HATE YOU.  
CA: an admittin it over trollian  
CA: howw bold  
CG: *PLATONIC* HATE, YOU DOUCHEY BATSHITTING FOOL!  
CA: i knoww that  
CG: YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO GET ON MY NERVES NOW, AREN'T YOU!?  
CA: wwhat me  
CA: no  
CA: nevver  
CA: you aint got no wway to get back here to get me to stop anywway  
CG: I MIGHT, BUT I DOUBT YOU WANT ME KICKING YOUR SORRY ASS SO HARD YOU GET SAND STUCK IN YOUR NOOK.  
CA: listen  
CA: i got blackmail  
CA: you dont  
CG: YES I DO.  
CA: you wwhat  
CA: no you dont  
CA: youre shittin me  
CA: wwhat blackmail  
CA: dont play this game i wwill be at your hivve so fuckin fast  
CG: IF YOU DO, FEEL FREE TO BRING MORE BOOKS. I'VE READ ALL THE ONES IN MY HIVE AT LEAST A HUNDRED TIMES ALREADY BY NOW.  
CG: INCIDENTALLY, I’M SURE I HAVE MORE ON YOU THAN YOU PROBABLY THINK I DO, ANYWAY.  
CA: fuck you i aint bringin you shit  
CG: AND WHY IS THAT?  
CG: AM I ACTUALLY HITTING A NERVE, AMPORA?  
CA: do i look like a rustblood  
CG: OF COURSE NOT, BUT EVEN SEA DWELLERS HAVE NERVES TO HIT. IT'S NOT MAGIC, THAT'S JUST BASIC KNOWLEDGE.  
CA: im gonna kick your ass  
CG: IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE A THREAT, AMPORA? BECAUSE IF IT IS, I'VE HEARD BETTER.

caligulasAquarium [CA]  ceased being trolled by  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

    You brandish your sickle, occasionally twirling it as you wait for Eridan’s supposed arrival. In retrospect, you probably went a bit too far by claiming you have blackmail on him, but what else were you supposed to say in order to get him to visit you, and maybe bring you some new books? _Hey, I’m bored. I’m going to test to see if I can swear on Trollian and I also want to ask you if I can borrow more books._ Fuck that. There’s no way in all of Paradox fucking Space that that would _ever_ work.

    Another growl is heard from downstairs. Well, you have time to kill, might as well calm your lusus down while you wait. … Again.

    You don’t know how much time has passed while you were trying to explain that you were just groaning at things being said online and that he doesn’t have to worry about it. An hour? Two? It took way too long to convince him of something that usually takes five minutes. Then again, he’s been a bit more on edge ever since you disappeared and then returned with bite marks on your damn neck. So you can’t exactly blame him too much for worrying.

    Eridan’s probably not here yet, as he hasn’t knocked or called out to you or messaged you on Trollian. You check your computer just to make sure he didn’t message you. After double checking, you grab one of the many books in your respiteblock and head out to your patio to read. Maybe you will notice him coming before he even arrives?

    You barely open the book when your ear twitches towards the roof; you hear something. It sounds like… Music? The fuck? Is Eridan already here and deciding to be dramatic by playing a melody to forebode your ass about to be handed to you ten times over? You sigh and captcha your book, starting the walk up to the patio.

    Upon your arrival, he doesn’t interrupt his melody or even acknowledge you. He just continues to sway to his melody, violin in hand. As he picks up his pace, his movement is somewhere between a cynical waltz and a merry jig. _Does he even know I’m up here?_ You don’t make an attempt to stop his act, wondering how long it will take for him to notice you. And then he begins to sing, passion and pain seeping in every word. After a moment, you notice… He doesn’t sing with his quirk. A chill goes down your spine; you’re unable to take your focus off of him. You don’t know how to feel about all of this. Enchanted? Terrified? It’s definitely different. He turns to face you ㅡ Oh, no wonder he hasn’t noticed you, his eyes are fucking shut! That doesn’t stop him from moving closer to you, though. His demeanor changes quickly from serenity to pride, a toothy grin being flashed at you. With a swift circular motion around his head, his scarf is swiped off and cast aside. He doesn’t miss a beat. _What the hell is even happening right now?_

    The song comes to a slow stop as he stands in front of you, extending the bow so it barely grazes your chin. His eyes ease open, a burning gaze piercing through you and going far beyond where you stand. You swallow, unable to look away.

“Did… Did you know I was here the whole time?” You only get silence, but he blinks.

“Hmm?” > _Hello_ <

“So, is that a yes or a no? Because you were dancing around me. I really can’t tell if you did that on purpose.” You gently push the bow away from your face.

“Howw…” He adjusts his posture, slipping his violin into his captcha. “Howw long wwere you up here?”

“Shortly after you started.” You shrug. “Is that something you do every time to play that thing?”

“Each song is different,” He puts his scarf back on. “but I’m definitely more tame with my fiddle.”

“Excuse me, more _tame_ ? What does that even mean? Do you have to be so fu ㅡ” _You left the remote behind._ “So excessive with every little thing you do?”

“Wwhy not?” He’s being serious. “I havve somethin’ special for _all_ the instruments I play.”

“Of course you do.” You’re getting a headache. “Whatever, did you come here to fight me or just show off?”

“Little of both.” He tosses a book to you. “And other reasons.” Some kind of adventure book? You smile at the gesture; you didn’t think he’d actually do that.

“What other reasons?”

“I didn’t do much wwhen I got back. I fixed the wwindowws, but that’s about it. Got nothin’ else to do.” You roll your eyes. _I almost forgot how bitchy Ampora was…_ Almost.

“Please, you probably have more to do in your hive than me. You’ve got… how many instruments?”

“Three.” _Why?_

“Okay, you have three instruments you can play to pass the time. Whereas all I’ve got are books I’ve read so many times, the pages fall out, movies I’ve seen countless times, and reading up on ~ATH to get better at coding.”

“Howw can _you_ be bored? I’m sure you havve a metric fuckton a movvies to wwatch. I just _wwork_.”

“I just told you I’ve seen them all countless times. I could probably recite them by memory at this point. And what do you even _work_ on? There’s no way you just work on whatever all the time. You probably have more books and movies than I have! Surely you’ve taken breaks at some point to read or watch one of them!”

    All he does is shrug, “The movvies I have aren’t that great to watch for a _break_. They’re all documentaries.”

    You gawk at him. “You’re joking, right?”

“Nope.”

 _I can’t believe he’s not bullshitting me…_ “Alright, I’ve decided we’re fixing this now.” You grab his wrist and start to lead him to the stairs.

“Wwhat?”

“We’re having a daㅡ” _Mental note: keep the damn remote on my person at all fucking times._ “We’re having a movie marathon.” You keep leading him until you get to the bottom of the first landing. The theaterblock is through that door.” You gesture to it before heading down the next flight of stairs, “get comfortable while I get a few things.” you pause for a minute, turning back to Eridan. “What do you want to drink?”

“Tea is fine.”

    You stare at him for a moment; _it can’t be that hard to make tea, right?_ “I’ll see what I can do.” With that, you head to your respiteblock to grab the remote before moving down the last flight of stairs to the mealblock to start _trying_ to make tea and getting other snacks and drinks ready for the marathon.

 _Scalding leaf fluid shouldn’t be too hard to make, right?_ You begin to boil water as you gather a few things to put into it. While that’s boiling, you begin making some buttery exploded kernels and grab a few hydration cylinders and some chips. You decide grabbing a bag will help in carrying everything back to the theater block, so you quickly grab one as you think the tea finishes. Putting the tea into a mug, it doesn’t look that good, but what do you know of tea? Jack shit, that’s what.

    Upon entering your theaterblock, you see Eridan perusing your walls of movies; he must be trying to decide which to start the marathon with. “I brought you some tea. I hope it’s to your liking,” you hand it to him and set down everything else.

“Did you just put spices in hot wwater?”

“Is that not what tea is?”

“Kar, this tastes like broth.”

“Well then, how the hellㅡAH!” And there goes the device. You bite your lip as you drop to your knees. You really do hate yourself sometimes. It only takes a few moments for you to turn off the device and compose yourself once more. “Then how do you even make tea?”

> _Karkat_ < “You don’t use spices.” _No shit, apparently._

“Then what _do_ you use?”

“You use cured leavves. Sometimes fruit and maybe flowwer buds.”

“Alright, got it.” You begin to head to the mealblock once more.

“Are you goin’ to try and make it again? Kar, it’s fine. Nevver sipped broth from a mug before.” You can hear him sip your failed attempt once again as you roll your eyes, going to try at it again. You have no clue what you’re fucking doing. Boiling water, tossing in some fruit before going outside and grabbing random flower buds nearby and throwing those in the water as well. _Is this seriously how you make tea?_ Whatever, it’s stupid and you doubt you’ll ever understand it.

    It takes you a few minutes, but you return to the theaterblock with a new mug, “Here. Hopefully this one is better.” You push the mug into his hand and go to grab the now emptyㅡ wait, what? He actually drank that shit? You can’t believe it so you just leave it there.

“Did you havve fun makin’ tea?” He taunts.

“Shut up, I still have no idea what I was doing.”

“There’s nothin’ hard about it, you’re ovverthinkin’ it.” he shrugs.

“You mean like I do with literally everything?”

“Wwould you relax? I drank the first one.”  
“I noticed! You didn’t have to drink that shitㅡ” you were ready that time, turning off the device immediately.

“Besides,” he takes a sip, “you did better wwith this one.”

“Great,” you deadpan. “Now sit the fuckㅡ” _off with that thing_ , “down.”

“Yeah yeah...”

    You shake your head; you doubt you’d be able to recreate it if you tried. You move to your wall and grab a movie, putting it in and setting it up as Eridan sits down. It’s about time someone showed this seadweller the joys of **_real_ ** movies and not some boring, ass-sucking documentaries.

 

\-      ♋    ♋    ♋     -

 

    You get about halfway through the movie you just started before there’s suddenly a female voice talking over it.

    “Here you are, Karkat! I was wondering where you were hiding!”

    You turn quickly, honestly a bit startled to hear the familiar voice in your hive; especially when you weren’t expecting any guests besides Eridan. “Jade! What the heㅡ” Nope. You’re not letting anyone else find out about the shit you’re in now. “What are you doing here?”

“I told you I was stopping by! Did you not get my message?”

“No, I didn’t. I haven’t been on my husktop for about an hour now.”

“That’s what you get for having less than five computers on your person.” She shakes her head, feigning disapproval.

“That’s too many daㅡ” _censor your damn self…_ “computers on any person!” You’re given a quizzical look in return.

“I can skedaddle if you want, um…” Her gaze shifts to your guest. “Oh, hey Eridan.”

“Hey.”

“Wait, you two know each other?”

“She’d stop by my hivve evvery here and then.” He shrugs. “It wwasn’t a big deal.” Oh sure, he invites Meenah and the _humans_ over to his hive, but he doesn’t even talk to you? _For a whole sweep_?

“Why?” They exchange a look. Was it because of that panicked memo you made way back when?

“It’s not like I went alone.” Jade crosses her arms. “And it _certainly_ wasn’t for anything fun.”

“Fuck off, I didn’t ask for any of you to come ovver.” So it wasn’t just her?

“Well, _you_ didn’t, but we still showed up.”

“Okay, seriously, what the heㅡ” Fuck, you can’t use _hell_ … you can’t even use _heck_. What can you even say here? Better say something soon before it becomes apparent that something might be up.

    Too late. You took more than three seconds thinking, it’s obvious now. And now their attention is back on you.

“You know, I thought you’d be a lot grouchier, Karkat.”

    You can feel your eye starting to twitch. Great. Just great. Why is this even happening now? “You’ve caught me in one of my _calmer_ moments. Congrats. What do you want, a cookie?”

“No no, it’s a good thing!”

“Sure it is. I bet the wholeㅡ” You so badly want to swear, “universe thinks a calmer me is a much better me.” You roll your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Are you feeling okay?” She comes closer, resting a hand on your shoulder. “You seem... different.”

“Wwe’vve been dealin’ wwith a lot lately.”

“What happened?” There’s a twinge of worry in her voice.

“He’s been dealin’ wwith a lot a fucked up trolls and I’vve been dealin' wwith… wwell, _him_.”

“First of all, _you_ ,” you glare at Eridan, “shut up.” You turn your attention back to Jade. “I’m fine, and believe me, Jade, you _don’t_ want to know.

“But I’m really worried now!”

“There’s nothing you can do about it, so there’s no point in you worrying about it.”

“See, this is the kinda shit I’vve been dealin’ wwith. He’s been nothin’ but evvasive and closed off towwards me.” _Ex_ cuse _me?_

“He can be a real handful, I know.” She giggles, nudging your shoulder.

    Your glare returns to Eridan, ignoring the nudge. “Oh, and like _you’re_ one to talk, Ampora?”

“I’m being serious, though.” Her smile fades. “You can’t give up on whatever is going on. You don’t know, maybe I can do something to help?”

“I seriously doubt there’s something anyone can do.”

“Eridan?” She turns to the seadweller besides you, “What’s wrong? Who hurt him?”

“I’m not hurt, just extremely inconvenienced. I’m **_fine_ **.”

“Yeah, no one’s hurt him, technically.”

“Nice try, but I know it’s something major if you aren’t swearing like it’s going out of style, so fed up! Are you sick? Did you lose a limb?”

    You hit your own forehead at the level of retardedness from the question. “Yes, Jade. I am missing a limb. You can clearly tell based on my lack of appendages. Behold! This pitiful shell of a troll as he shambles through the remainder of his miserable existence!”

“I knew it.” She nods. “Now, why can’t you swear?

“It’s, uh” Eridan thinks. “ it’s a long story.”

“What happens when he does?”

    You can feel your face start to heat up from a combination of humiliation or embarrassment. “No! We are _not_ getting into that!”

“Hold on. Are you…” She smiles wide. “you're blushing! c’mon, you can tell me!” She’s really egging you on for the dirt. _Why can’t she take a hint?_

“It really ain’t that interestin’, Jade.” He rests a hand on your shoulder, speaking softly. “Wwhy don’t you step out for a bit. I can abridge the story for her if you wwant. Up to you.”

    You immediately get up. “Do what you want. I’m taking the mugs and trash downstairs.” You quickly gather said things up and head down the stairs, Jade quickly stealing your place on the loungeplank.

    Your face is still hot as you put the mugs in the sink. God damn, can this sweep get any more unbearable? First, Kankri acting completely unlike himself takes you to visit the damn Grand Clownfuck, then you get a damn ass plug shoved into you that prevents you from verbally swearing. On top of that, only that clown shit can remove it or you can say goodbye to your ass trying yourself. And to turn it off, you have to degrade yourself one way or another! And now, Jade is learning about your damn dilema. You’re positive the universe is determined to shit on you for the rest of eternity, or at least, your life, for all the shitty karma you’ve gone and wracked up over the sweeps.

    You need to calm yourself down before you head back up to your theaterblock. To distract yourself, you take the time to check on your lusus. He seems to be resting for the moment. Well, that’s what you thought before he lifts his head to look at you.

“I’m fine. I am just checking on you. And no, I am not feeding you early, you’re going to have to wait until later, got it?” Crabdad just lets out a low growl as his response. Good, he’s cooperating with you. “Good. I’ll be in the theaterblock.” You begin to head back upstairs, but you make a slight detour to your ablutionblock, running the sink and splashing some water on your face. You hope that Eridan is done explaining shit to Jade. You already know your own predicament, you’d rather not hear about it again.

    You dry your face quickly before you finally make your way back to your guests, thankfully, it seems quiet. Eridan must’ve already finished discussing what’s going on. However, as soon as you enter the block, both sets of eyes are on you and Jade starts speaking.

“Karkat, you know I have space powers, right? I can shrink it. Then you can maybe pass it.”

“That _could_ wwork. Wwouldnt’ you wwant to givve it a shot?”

    You blink for a moment before your eyes widen in realization. _There is something she can do!_ “Jade!” You rush to her, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her slightly. “Please! Jade! Get it out! Right now!”

“Yeah, of course!” She starts looking you over. “So, where is it?”

    And like that, a blush returns to your face. “Jade, it’s a butt plug.”

“... is it _visible?_ ” You can almost feel her gaze shift downward.

“Oh, come on.” Eridan sighs and stands in front of you, grabbing the back of your shift and pulling up. “It’s about this far dowwn.” A finger circles on your lower back. Jade is suppressing a giggle.

“What the heㅡwhat are you laughing for, Harley?”

“Relax! I’m only here to help.” Her hands replace Eridan’s on your back. After a moment, “I need you to strip.”

“I’m sorry, you want me to _what_?”

“Do you want it out or not?”

    You groan loudly as your blush starts to spread to your ears. You can’t believe you have to do this. “Fine! Whatever!” you say as you strip your pants and boxers off

“You need to relax, Kar.” Eridan turns away. “You’re just gonna make it harder on yourself.”

“Take a deep breath, okay?”

    You sigh as you glare at the wall of movies. “Yeah, yeah. Just get it over with.”

    She pats your back a few times. You feel something shift and you don’t know how to feel about it.

“Okay, that should do it! How do you feel?”

    Blinking, you feel your blood start to boil slightly. “All you had to do was pat my back. Why did you make me strip, then!?”

“Well I’m sorry, but I needed to see it!”

“Yeah, sure.” rolling your eyes, you pull your boxers and pants back up.

“You have a cute butt, if it helps,” at least she’s not making fun of you. “It’s perky!”

    Time to try and cover your blush with your hand. It works, kinda? “Jade, I do notㅡwhatever. I’m making sure the thing is out.” you hurry to the ablutionblock, slamming the door behind you.

“Make sure you hold onto it.”

    A few minutes pass before you return, the ass plug from hell no longer in you and you’re free to speak as you wish. “Thank fuck for that damn thing being out of me!” Even though the device is no longer inside of you, you can still feel the vibrations of it in your hand.

“You ain’t out of it yet. Noww, you havve the remote _and_ the device right?”

“Yes, I still have the damn remote.

“Put them in this.” He tosses you a small black box.

    It isn’t hard to catch it, “right.” After you turn the device off, you put the damn combo in the box, you close it. Just then, your sign appears on it. “The fuck?” You try and open it again: no luck.

“Good, noww he can’t track that it’s out.”

“Is that why this box won’t open again?”

“Yeah.”

“Well isn’t that handy. Thank you.”

“If you dont wwant to hold onto it,” he holds his hand out. “I’ll stash it somewwhere for you.”

    You raise an eyebrow at him, your voice laced with sarcasm. “Where? In a book on a bookshelf?”

“Or just _behind_ the books on the bookshelf.”

    You roll your eyes at this, but you drop the box into his hand anyway. “You say that like you _do_ have one of these damn boxes in a book on a bookshelf somewhere in your damn hive.”

    He just smiles at you, patting you on the shoulder.

“Good to havve you back, Kar.”

“That’s an understatement! It’s fucking _amazing_ to be able to speak freely again! No more of that slow talking and _being careful what I say_ shit! I can speak without fear of a slip up causing my ass to vibrate to high hell!”

> _Happy_ < “I knoww.”

“My ass is still definitely going to need to recover from having that damn thing in there for a few days.”

“Wwell, no shit.”

    You shake your head as you plop back onto the loungeplank. You can almost feel a phantom plug in your ass as you sit, but right now, this is the most comfortable seat you’ve had in days. Wipes even.

“So, what are you two doing, anyway?” Jade sits on the arm of the loungeplank. “I wasn’t interrupting anything, was I?”

“Eridan is here for a movie marathon, but that was only after I kind of antagonized him in a chat to try and get him to come over. He said he was going to kick my ass after I did that,” you shrug. “So nothing really too unusual.

“Oh, okay.” She shakes her head. “Wait, why did he do that?”

“Because we told each other that we had blackmail on each other.

“I see! So what _was_ the blackmail?”

“Honestly? I just lied to see if he’d actually show up.”

“You wwhat?” For someone that looks mad, a light blush comes to his face.

“I don’t need to know, I’m only teasing!”

“But seriously, Jade. Thank you. I owe you one. Big time.”

“Well, would you mind if I joined you guys for the marathon?”

    You shrug, might as well have more people witness Eridan’s reactions to _real_ movies, right? “Sure, you can join,” you start to shift to make room on the loungeplank, moving closer to the armrest. She sits down one the other side. _Fucking finally, you can relax_. You pick up the remote to hit play…

    And the box starts to vibrate. Eridan’s smile is quick to fade.

“Hey Cro,” Eridan grumbles dryly, setting his mug down as he stands. “howw nice a you to knock.”


	10. ♒ My Demons ♒

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ♒ Perhaps not all gestures have to be big and bold

“Nice try but… yeah, wwe had some wwork done.”

“Really? It vwould seem some blackmail is in order.” Your dancestor eyes you suspiciously before his focus shifts to Karkat. “So tell me,” His arm firmly plants against the back of the couch, caging his victim. “Vwhat should wve do about that?”

“Wasn’t using your perverse ass toy to police my every word enough for you freaks?” He spits, panic rising in his voice.

“Not evwen close, swveetie... not unless you vwant another special wvisit?” You hear an audible gulp and see Karkat trying to lean away, but there’s no use.

“Why don’t you leave him alone?” _Jade, stay out of this_. “He hasn’t done anything for you to be picking on him like this.” He doesn’t even look at her. He just… laughs at her.

“Babydoll, you don’t knowv vwhat you’re talking about. So, I suggest you stay out of our business before things get ugly for you _and_ your friends.” She says nothing, her ears dipping back as she looks at you. “Nowv, vwhere wvas I?”

“ _Wwe_ can make a deal.” You grab his shoulder and pull him back and away from the couch. “But that depends if it’ll keep your hands offa my ㅡ keeps your hands offa Kar.” That slip of the tongue had no grace and didn’t go unnoticed. Cronus pulls off of the couch, his focus on you. _Everyone_ is focused on you now, actually.

“Vwhat wvas that?”

“Nothin’.” A bit quick on that response.

“No, I think you wvere about to confess something to your little boy toy here.” He grins widely. “Don’t think I didn’t knowv about you turning off his devwice, lovwe.”

“Yeah? And wwhat about it?”

    The room is quickly growing tense. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Karkat’s focus alternating between the two of you. _Believe me, I’m just as nervous as you._

“Eridan, I think you should finish vwhat you _really_ meant to say. Because if you wvere going to say vwhat I _think_ you wvere going to say...” He shrugs, swaggering closer to you. “I don’t knovw. Maybe I’ll let you make a deal wvith me. Or, better yet:” He pulls you close, a hand resting on your shoulder. He whispers to you: “I’ll keep him safe from the boss if you make him _your_ project.” _You have the gall…?_

“No.” You shove him away and he staggers a few steps back. Your fins dip back as you scowl at him. “You knoww, it kinda sucks howw evvery time somethin’ good happens for me you gotta fuck it up.” You cross your arms. “This is the second Vvantas you’ve fucked wwith, damnit! And frankly, if I’m gonna admit to anythin’, it’ll be on my owwn fuckin’ terms, not because you’re gonna torture him if I don’t.”

“Are you sure about that?” His flirty, playful demeanor was gone in a flash. You hear Karkat shiver. You can already feel this isn’t going to pan out in your favor.

    But that doesn’t mean you’re standing down.

“I knoww howw to handle you, Cro. You had me in grips for at least a swweep. So if youre gonna do anythin’, you deal wwith me. You leave Kar outta this.”

“Are you sure about this?” His hand cups your cheek. “Do you vwish to take his punishment as your owvn?”

“I’m used to it at this point.” you tug your scarf off and toss it behind you, talking at Cronus as you make him back up from the couch and towards the door. “You’re a wwaste a my bloodline an you don’t deservve to carry the title of a Ampora. You’re despicable, undeservvin’ a respect, an you knoww,” You’re pressed nose to nose, seething with rage. “you’re just some pathetic, lonely, Makara wwannabe. And I find that not to evven be wworth the scum under my shoes.” You grab his by the collar of his shirt. “Noww, get the fuck outta here... Let’s do wwhat wwe gotta do.”

He only laughs at your threats.

“You havwe no idea vwhat you signed yourself up for.”

 

    With a snap of his fingers, you’re greeted with pitch blackness: the environment you’ve grown to be all too familiar with. _Can we cut the shit and get this over with? Seriously, a sweep of this and we’re_ still _doing theatrics?_ Regardless, you commit to the routine: stripping down and kneeling on the floor, awaiting your tormentor’s judgement. After several minute of waiting, A spotlight shines onto you. However, this does nothing to light up the rest of the room. Your hands are quickly bound to your ankles with an odd chain, all of it connected to a chain harness on your torso.

“Oh look, _chains_ .” You’re sure someone is around to see you roll your eyes. “I can see wwe’re executin’ the slavve gambit _again_. You fuckers runnin’ outta material or somethin’?”

“ **OH, ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?** ” Maniacal laughter echoes the chamber. “ **MAYBE SKIPPING ROPE WITH YOUR ENTRAILS SOUNDS MORE APPEALING TO YOU?** ”

“Oh, and the Grand Highblood came to do Cro’s dirty wwork.” You don’t even pay attention to his threats anymore. Like he’s going to do shit to his favorite toy. “God, he’s a lazy fuck… Hey, Grand Highblood! Shut the fuck up and get to the point, you juggalo piece of shit!” He quickly slaps you in the mouth.

“ **HOLD YOUR TONGUE BEFORE I TAKE IT FROM YOU MYSELF. IS THAT CLEAR?** ”

You recoil from the hit, spitting out some blood. “I wwelcome it, your _mirthfulness_.” You grin, making sure your sarcasm is coming off as thick as possible.

“ **WELL, ISN’T SOMEONE IN THE MOOD TO TALK BACK? I THINK I HAVE SOMETHING THAT’LL SHUT YOUR TRAP...** ”

“Is it a ball gag? Or your bulge? Hurry up already.” _Honestly, what’s the worst he can do to you?_

You hear something roll to you. When it comes into your light, you see a juggling club.

“ **DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS?** ”

“It’s a jugglin’ club.” You shrug. “Wwhat, are you gonna beat me ovver the head wwith it?”

“ **I KNOW YOU’RE SMARTER THAN THAT, BOY. LOOK CLOSER.** ”

You study the club closer to find… blood splatters. _Red_ blood splatters. _That. Fucking. Bastard._ You feel your rage boil hot in your chest.

“You…” You hiss. “Wwhat did you fuckin’ do to him?”

“ **HE’S BEEN A PAIN IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ASS SINCE YOU ALL UP AND LEFT, BUT I’VE BEEN ABLE TO MAKE HIM SUCCUMB TO MY WILL.** ”

“You fuckin’ㅡ”

“ **AND IF YOU WANT HIM TO STAY ALIVE, I SUGGEST YOU KEEP YOUR MOTHERFUCKING MOUTH SHUT, BOY.** ”

    You don’t even want to breathe.

“ **NOW, AS FOR YOUR PUNISHMENT: UPON ANY INCIDENT YOU PUT ON ONE OF YOUR CAPES, CHAINS WILL APPEAR AND RESTRAIN YOU AGAINST THE GROUND UNTIL YOU BURN THE CAPE.** ” _… That’s his big plan? To wreck your wardrobe?_ “ **YOU WILL STAY IN THESE CHAINS UNTIL I FEEL YOU’VE LEARNED TO HOLD YOUR TONGUE. SPEAKING OF WHICH, IF YOUR LITTLE BOYFRIEND SWEARS, THESE CHAINS WILL SEND AN INTENSE SHOCK THROUGH YOU.** ” _More electrocution? Seriously, why is it always electrocution with these fuckers?_ “ **HAVE FUN!** ”

 

    In a blink, you return to your study, but you’re still bound in your chains. You expected this muchㅡ

“Karkat, Eridan’s back!” _But this was unexpected._ Jade walks in and crouches next to you. “What happened? Do I need to shrink another buttplug?”

“Eridan!” Karkat comes rushing into the room. “What the hell happened?!”

    You grit your teeth as the shock courses through you. _What are they doing here? How did they know to come here?  … Why the_ fuck _are they here!?_ You shiver and jerk in the chains as you’re basically fried. Breathing is rapidly becoming a challenge. You want to succumb to the pain… Your head hangs as your visions begins to fade.

“Eridan?” Jade is trying to keep you focused on her. “Are you doing okay?” You need out of this, and since these two are all you have right now...

You focus all of your energy on your new caretakers.  
“Jade?” She nods. “I need help. Quickly.” You look to Karkat. “In my desk, left drawwer.” You’re panting. “Small blue envvelope. Get the key.” He just nods and begins to rummage.

“Is this what you were going through so long ago and wouldn’t tell us about?” Jade rests your head in her lap. She sighs and appearifies a blanket over you. “Wish I knew.”

“Believve me, no you don’t.”

“Wait, who’s ‘ _us_ ’?”

“Kar, talk later.” At least he got the key. “Givve it to her.” She gets up, resting you back onto the floor. “Noww listen carefully. They havve to be done in order…”

    You continue to guide her through opening the locks, one after the other five locks come undone without much issue. Then there’s the masterlock on your back.

“It looks like a big button.” She tells you. _Of course, it’s that one_.

“Don’t hold back: hit the button as hard as you can.”

“Are you sure? I can try to warp youㅡ”

“No,” You blurt out. “I can handle it, just do it.”

    She waits for you to change your mind, but ultimately she stands up and slams her fist into your back. Whatever little distance there was between you and the floor is gone. The impact was so strong, you’re certain you could’ve coughed out a lung. You see Karkat wincing out of the corner of your eye as you try to catch your breath. You cough up a mouthful of blood.

“Are you okay?” Jade stammers. “Was that not hard enough?”

“Keepㅡ” You clear your throat. “Keep the chains in the blanket. Do _not_ let those chains touch you.” They step back from the lump of fabric and metal as you try to sit up. “I’ll take care of it later.”

“Eridan, Iㅡ”

“Kar, fuck off. Not noww.” You try to get onto your feet but you’re literally shaking. You just drop to your knees, your glasses slipping and falling off your face. They clack onto the floor. “I need to get outside.”

“Wouldn’t you want to get dressed first?” Jade picks you up and heads to the door regardless. A guilt-ridden Vantas follows at a distance.

“Right, get dressed just to get wwet again.” You roll your eyes.

“Hey! I’m trying to help.” She stops at the shoreline. “So, what’s in the water that’s going to help you? Do I just throw you in?” You just shake your head and make another attempt to stand on your own. Instead, she helps you stand. “See those tidepools?” You point to a small cluster of tidepools and a larger, more elevated tidepool in the center. “I need to get to the big one.” She groans.

“ _Or_ , I could just do this.” She teleports you into the tide pool, the shrimps scrambling under the surface. “Sorry, Eridan, but this is just getting too tedious at this point!” she yells to you. “What else could you possibly need me to do?”

“Nothin’,” You wave her off. “Bug Kar or somethin’, I need to be alone.” She looks back at Karkat, who just shrugs at her. She shrugs back and they retreat into your hive, the sun starting to rise. You sink under the surface and let the shrimps do their job.

 

\-     ♒     ♒     ♒     -

 

    You awake and resurface, anticipating the bright sun… but it seems to be going down. _I slept the whole day?_

“Welcome back.” Jade murmurs to you, hovering over a nearby tidepool. “Are you feeling any better?” You open your mouth to talk, but she interrupts, rubbing the back of her head. “So, listen, I’m… sorry I was so cold to you for the past few years. I had no idea that’s what you were going through, but Dirk really didn’t tell me much of anything whenever we came here. I thought we were just spoiling you for some reason.” _What is she getting at?_ She picks up a rock and skips it out to sea. “Karkat’s really worried about you. He doesn’t want to tell you for some reason, but we’ve been talking _all day_ about it.” She glares at you. “I don’t see why _you_ , but I guess you two have some kind of history together.” She skips another rock. “Don’t get me wrong, I still think you’re an entitled brat that thinks he’s above everything, but Karkat is so certain that’s not who you are anymore.” She turns back to you, studying you for any kind of facial retaliation, but you don’t give her anything. No scowls, no scoffing, not a single eye rolls for her. “I can kinda see it? But I guess I’m not the one you need to convince, right?” She shrugs. “I’m going to let him know you’re awake and I’m going to leave, but make no mistake: Karkat is one of my best friends. And if something happens to him because of you…” She picks up another rock. It glows green for a moment before it turns to dust. “Well, maybe not _total_ disintegration, but you get the idea.” _Loud and clear_. You nod and she forces a smile. “Alright, now go get dressed, I’m tired of seeing you naked.” You stand, but she stops you and puts a hand on your shoulder. “And hey. Make sure to put on something nice.” Before you can question her, She has you teleported to your respiteblock. You are really getting tired of being teleported all over the place.

    You peek back out the window and see Karkat running out to Jade, yelling. She’s smiling and playfully shoving, holding a few boxes. They argue before he takes one. She waves goodbye and disappears as he stomps away. _What was that about? What’s in the box?_ Whatever, you need clothes. And how stupidly vague was that? _Something nice_? Like what, exactly? She’s gone, why do you need to get dressed up for someone who isn’t even here? Who are you trying to impress, Karkat? All he’s going to do is rub it in about how uppercaste you live, why dress up? Then again, you don’t want to face the witch’s wrath, so you gradually make your way to your wardrobe and pick out… ‘something nice’.

    You look over yourself in the full-body mirror, outfit to outfit, until you settle on something you consider to be fit for both Jade and Karkat’s standards. Pinstripe pants with navy suspenders, white button down on a black cashmere scarf, and a pair of Heiress Shell-sea boots. That’s nice enough, right? Worst case scenario, you’ll be wearing a black overcoat over most of it. You could put back on some jewelry and slick your hair up like usual, but do you really feel like showing off that hard? You leave your hair the tousled mess it is and your fingers naked for now. This only leaves one more thing for you to get: where the fuck are your glasses? You stumble downstairs and find your lusus attempting to pick them up with his mouth. You try to pat him on the head, but he leaves once you’re nearby. _Whatever, ass._ You clean off your glasses and, with no sign of Karkat anywhere, you head back outside to enjoy the night. You just let your focus haze out on the general view of the horizon for a few minutes until your fin flickers. Someone has finally come to join you.

“Hey,” he mumbles. “Good to see you finally awake.” You turn to him, and it looks like you’re not the only one Jade forced to gussy up. Black slacks and a red button down with a pair of Derbies. Did he comb his hair? Who is this? Why is he holding a mug? You try to respond, but your voice is too raspy from the sea soak.

> _Hello_ <

“Yes, yes, hello.” He rolls his eyes at you. “Are you okay?” You tap your throat. “You can’t talk, huh? Alright.” You give him a gentle smile and code his name. He doesn’t comment, but you do see his eye twitch.

“This is a simple yes or no question: am I allowed to swear again?” You nod. “Thank fuck.” He looks down at the mug before giving it to you. “Here. It probably isn’t the same as the tea I made last time, but I figured this would at least be a start for making things up to you.” _What is he talking about?_ Regardless, you take the mug and take a few sips. Floral, very sweet.

“Thanks.”

“Wait, you can talk again, just like that?”

“Kar, I wwas sittin’ in the salty fuckin’ ocean for like twwelvve hours. Tea helps.”

“How the fuck does a few measly sips of tea restore your ability to speak?”

“Don’t wwory about it,” you sigh. “Still havvin’ trouble wwalkin’, if that helps.”

“Then why the hell aren’t you sitting down inside instead of standing out here like a wistful dipshit?” You shrug.

“Just thinkin’.”

“And you _really_ have to do that out here?” Your fin twitches in agitation. You set your mug down on a nearby rock, your hands sifting into your pockets.

“It’s a solace.”

“Ah. Well, before I leave you to your thoughts, I cleaned up in your study.” He turns and starts to walk away, but…

“Kar, wwait.” He stops and looks back at you. “Wwhy don’t you stay out here wwith me?” He sighs and comes back to you. You pick your mug up and sit down, you look at him as he joins you, your fins idly twitching.

“You really love signing ‘hello’, don’t you?”

“Force a habit. Wwell, that ain’t exactly true. ‘Habit’ is me holdin’ them still so no one pokes fun, but it’s just us, you knoww?”

“So if you’re with me or alone, you just sign ‘hello’ constantly?” He looks confused.

“Not like I’m constantly sayin’ ‘hello’,” you smile a bit, sipping your tea. “Idle fin movvement is the same thing. Did you think I wwas _that_ stupid?”

“I honestly thought you were testing me on something I’ve practically memorized by now.” You shake your head and chuckle. “It’s not that fucking funny.” He rolls his eyes. “Just go back to your fucking thoughts of whatever.”

    You take a few more sips of tea, looking down into your mug as you swirl it around.

“It wwas electrocution, by the wway.”

“What was? That king of paint pricks somehow made it so that when I swore, those chains fucking electrocuted you? How mental is he?”

“Ain’t nothin’ neww,” you shrug. “I’m tellin’ you, they uh… they ran outta ideas since they let me go.” You don’t know how to interpret Karkat’s face now. He’s either appalled or concerned. Both?

“And how fucking long did you say you were their slave for? A whole sweep?”

“At least.”

“Damn… How did you even get out of it?”

“It wwasnt easy. I had to conservve energy for a wwhile, and that wwas hard enough: they didn’t do fuck all to take care a me. I didn’t havve any wweapons that wworked on them, but that’s probably wwhy they sent me back in _multiple_ chains: that’s all it took.”

“That still sounds like a literal hell to go through.”

“It wwas. I think the reason I stayed so long is…” You shrug, your focus going to your feet. “Maybe I felt like I deservved it?”

“You only killed two trolls. If anyone deserves what you went through, It’s Gamzee. Though, I highly doubt that clown fucker will get any of what he deserves...”

“Yeah, wwell, fuck him and his blood lineage.”

“Agreed.” You set your mug aside and lie down. Things stay quiet like this few a good while until Karkat’s yawn breaks the silence.

“You evver think a howw different things wwould’vve been if had just listened to you in the first place?”

“Well, for starters, Feferi wouldn’t have died to you and Kanaya wouldn’t have realized she was a Rainbow Drinker… After that, I don’t know. It could’ve been possible you’d be with us as we traveled through the dream bubbles on our way to the new session, but I doubt Gamzee’s rampage would’ve been different since he was already out of the room when you snapped. I’m not the right person to ask, anyway, I’m not a time player. You’re better off asking Aradia or Strider.

“But I’m not _askin’_ anyone else,” You prop yourself up to look at him better. “I’m askin’ _you_.” His focus leaves you as he looks out the horizon. He sighs.

“Like I said: I don’t know.” _Now what?_

“Kar,” He glances back to you. “You nevver got to finish that talk wwith me. The honesty shit.”

“Oh yeah…” He thinks. “What were you going to call me when you stumbled on ‘offa Kar’? I have a pretty good idea what you were going to say either way.” He shrugs and lies down.

“It wwas a slip a the tongue.”

“ _Sure it was_.” He rolls his eyes and doesn’t believe you for a minute. “Then why did you take my place for the punishment?” Your brows raise.

“Ain’t it obvvious?”

“I want to hear it fucking said, damnit!” He sits up and glares at you.

“I kneww howw to handle it to the letter. They did some pretty shitty things. I’m not sure you wwould’vve been able to handle it, but me, well…” You look off to the sea again. “I’m pretty hardened for this shit. There’s nothin’ they could’vve done that they havven’t done already… I mean, no, that ain’t exactly true, either.” He watches you as your fins dip down. “They could’vve just taken you anywway.”

“Taken me as in do what they did to you?”

“Or taken us both. Either one.” He frowns at you.

“Not that I’m not grateful or anything, but don’t you think that was fucking risky on your part?” The tone in his voice is telling you he’s not happy with these answers, but you promised honesty, right? “Even if they already did everything that could to you, what was to stop them from taking you away and making you live that hell again?”

“I didn’t care!” You erupted. “They could’vve taken me and culled me on sight, I wwouldn’t havve cared. I just wwanted you to be safe, Kar.”

    He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. _Good answer?_ You’d think that up until he suddenly socks you square in the nose. _Bad answer. Clearly a very bad answer._ You don’t flinch from it. You lie back down and hold you nose as Karkat proceeds to scold you over your bold decisions as of late.

“Do you not fucking realized how guilt ridden I felt when Cronus took you away to endure _my_ punishment?! How the hell do you think I would’ve felt if they culled you on sight?! I’ll tell you how I would’ve felt!” _Here we go_ . “I would’ve felt like your death was _my_ fault! You think I want to live the rest of my life with that on my fucking hands?! There would be no way for anyone to convince me otherwise, either! What happened to you when you disappeared was _my_ fault! Everything that’s fucking happened with you, Kankri, and Cronus with the Grand Highblood is _my fault_.”

“No, it isn’tㅡ”

“I don’t even know what I would’ve done if you died besides feel nothing but guilt! Do you even realize how guilty I felt when you came back naked _in fucking chains_?! How the hell am I even going to make up for all the fuck ups I’ve caused you?!”

    You fiddle with your nose as Karkat catches his breath. Finally, you snap it back into place.

“You don’t owwe me anythin’. That’s not wwhy I did wwhat I did. This wwasn’t some kind a noble prince mission to wwin you ovver or wwhatever. It wwas solely to keep you safe. I knoww these pricks wwell enough that they’re the reason your dancestor completely changed. And trust me: he used to come here _all the time_ to pester and lecture me ovver the smallest damn things. So don’t sit here and take the blame for somethin’ that’s been in the wworks since before you evven got taken. I ain’t gonna apologize for wwhat I did, Kar. I did wwhat I had to because I didn’t wwant you to become one of them.”

> _Guilt_ <

“So much for fucking honesty, or is that _partially_ honest?” You give no answer. “Whatever. Either way, that doesn’t change the fact that _I_ am to blame for some of the more recent shit you’ve had to go through.”

“No, I came back lookin’ like that because that wwas my fault. Do you expect light punishment wwhen you tell the Grand Highblood to go fuck himself?” He blinks at you. You can’t tell if he’s shocked or possibly impressed.

“Either way, that was in place for _my_ punishment. It was my fault you were sent there to begin with.”

“I don’t care, Cro does this all the time: I get close to someone and start to open up and form good relationships and he sends them to that awwful place and they nevver speak to me again. I’m done wwith them makin’ this about me bein’ a slavve because I’m denyin’ my casteright. I’m done wwith them robbin’ me of my happiness and thinkin’ they can control my life like this, Kar. Believve it or not,” You fins droop. “I just wwanna be happy. That’s wwhat I wwas defendin’.”

    The two of you just stare at each other before he sighs and lies back down.

“Alright, I’ll _try_ to accept that, but don’t expect me to apologize for punching you.”

“No, I get wwhy you did it. Didn’t expect it, though. I wwasn’t tryin’ to wworry, you, you knoww.”

“And how you do expect me _not_ to fuckin worrry after all of that?”

“I mean, I get it: if I’m gone, you’re stuck at my hivve, but I didn’t think it wwas _personal_ concern.”

“Look, I know I wanted to kill you after you went batshit insane during our session, but that doesn’t change the fact we were still pretty close before that.” His focus goes back to the sky. “If anything, we’ve probably gotten closer these past few days.” You look away. “There was definitely going to be personal concern no matter what. I don’t know how you were so stupid to not think it was going to be anything _but_ personal.”

“I thought you wwould’vve still been mad at me ovver wwhat happened in my study a feww days ago. I’m surprised you havven’t tried to sickle my fins off yet.” You look back, expecting to see an angry face, but you get an embarrassed, flushed one instead.

“I… I’m more grateful than angry. My options were to either get your help or wait for Cronus to turn the damn thing off.”

“Still, _that_ I’ll apologize for. I knoww you didn’t havve much of a choice.” You scoff. “Probably wwasn’t any good anywway, so I’ll apologize for the half-ass handjob, too.” You fin perks at him mumbling something. “I’m sorry, wwhat?” He stays quiet, but you think you heard him correctly. “Kar, don’t go strokin’ my ego, I knoww it wwas shit.” He only get redder.

“It was honestly the best fucking thing I’ve ever felt…”

“Wwhat, you wwant me to provve I can do better?” You can’t help but blush yourself. Karkat opens and closes his mouth a few times, at a loss for words.

“It’s a yes or no question, Kar, you can just nod your head.” You shake your head. “I ain’t gonna press, I’m still kinda fucked up.”

“... Maybe some other time, then.” He finally replies. You smile to yourself and your focus goes back out to the sea.

> _Karkat_ <

“Fine by me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♒ Do you guys feel like a Q & A? leave us enough questions and maybe we'll post one!


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